Comments
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Firstly, let me say thank you for the post. I appreciate anyone who is thinking about how to improve the site.
TSF was originally set up by Mike Frisbee as a place for people to help each other write songs. And I try to continue that.
Love the music!
Any comments from me should be taken as "have you thought about...". And now you have! The choices are always yours, and you should go with what feels right to you 😀
Moody! I think you missed the link to music there.
The disjointed phrases like: "I flew to the moon because .... To cool in your blueness" throw me a little, but I'm assuming they are meant to. The first verse does talk about madness! An…
Ah this is really nice. Dirt and Denim is a great way to summarize a happy childhood. And it makes a terrific hook, very memorable.
The upbeat energy of the music is a great fit to the theme.
I love how "Dirt and Denim" comes out in t…
I like this a lot Elvis. Really gets the message across.
I think the Rockwell painting as a metaphor is inspired, and I love how you circle back with phrases like "nobody painted me".
Very visual, lots of details that build upon each …
That video is gorgeous! It looks like a lot of work!
The mix sounds very clear to me, the vocals nice and clear without dominating.
It is a sad lyric, but I love your poetic style and this one is no exception! Thoughts becoming crows…
I don't know Kayla's situation, but in general there are people who need to receive more than they can give in return. I'm happy that I'm in a position to give. But if I give with the expectation of repayment, that's not a gift, that's a transact…
Nice! Modern sound. Overall I think this holds up well. Feels like a breakup song.
And welcome to the forum! Don't forget to leave feedback for others whilst you are here. We ask you to leave 2 comments for each song of your own you post.
@ElvisNash Make sure you contact the lyricist, Kayla in this case, before setting their lyric…
None of us get out alive. Living in the meanwhile is a strong message.
Kale and wheatgrass give you better odds than cigarettes and booze, but that's a decision we each get to make.
I think the message comes across clearly and the mus…
I was talking to a friend the other day and saying that from now on people in our cohort are going to start dropping out. I think this song is very much on that page. I think a lot of people will understand and nod hearing it.
The harmonica…
Catch-23 is a strong title, going to hook people with that one, and they'll get the idea immediately.
The "gasoline eyes" phrase wasn't clear to me either, but it's memorable. Could be a nice mystery for people to argue about,
I can s…
Sounds like a wild woman!
The music you've chosen almost feels like a 90 degree turn to the lyric. Very upbeat and energetic. And an almost comical contrast. Did you choose it deliberately for that effect? And of course there's a gospel fla…
I hear ya! Bit of grit in the vocals. Or write for a female vocal and hear it sung that way. Very useful.
The lyric felt at its strongest (to me) when the singer is describing how like his father he is. That's not only relatable, it explai…
Can't add anything useful here I'm afraid
That's a wild ride! I enjoyed that. Something a bit different. Felt like I was there.
That's clever! And it works too.
Yes, you definitely got a lift to the song going that route. Is that something you regularly do in Suno, try it out in different styles? Always good to know how people are using tools to get best results!
True. Music is always vital, but the quality of the lyric itself still matters. The lyric to Don McLean's Vincent is going to go a lot further with the right music than Pat Wilson's Bop Girl.
Also "depends on the music" isn't a direct answe…
Love both changes!
@MuskieBait44 Yep, you read it right. That's exactly the meaning.
Thanks all! Some great feedback there! Lots to ponder. I may not repost a new version, but I will definitely be looking at all those suggestions, and intend to use at least some of them. Thank you all for checking out the details and sharing your…
Yep, that works. Nice structure to it. Loved these lines:
Laid her head against my heart
Like she owned that place
Nice build up over the verses.
Like what Suno did with that last verse too.
Goo…
It's a wonderful sentiment. I have a daughter too (also with common sense) and hope I would deal with the situation similarly should it arise, but who knows?
I would have liked a little more variation between the verse and chorus, but I sus…
I can understand that Elvis! It's not a story song in the usual way of those. Things implied rather than stated outright.
Appreciate the feedback!
Tons of emotion captured.
Love the dynamics across the song.
Everything felt smooth to me! Good stuff.
"Crossed a quiet line" -ooh I like that!
Love the "Yeah...right"s!
That's a very clear image in the mirror you're holding up there!
Strong tune.
Howdy, Stranger!