Comments
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Strikes me as being funny / sad / pitiable.
This character's life seems like a mess!
Strong visuals throughout, I can picture this person. I may have met them!
I like the blues treatment you've chosen for it too.
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Lovely lyric!
I wasn't sure of this line at first: "That leaves you in control of having no control at all" but hearing it, it works perfectly.
Have to agree with the others re the music. The chorus needs to rise into passion, but I …
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Line 1 "In other words you did lie to my face" makes me feel like I'm coming in, in the middle of an argument. Gives it a feeling of energy and dynamism straight away. Not as keen on "you did lie", I think "you lied" would feel more conversationa…
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Kayla your lyrics are always chock full of emotion, and I suspect that's your priority.
Your structure is always fairly loose. That might work in a hip-hop or modern style, there's quite a bit of flexibility there, or it might not, I can't …
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Don't really know what to make of that! Is it comedic? The contrast is strong between events and tone. I'm probably not the right audience to appreciate it.
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I've moved this to the Covers section.
I'm like Sid, I can hear this being sung as a work song where repetition makes it easier for everyone to join in. As a stand alone song it feels a bit repetitious - at least to me.
Nice to hear …
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I'm afraid I don't get it. I don't understand why it started about "you" then switched to "me" or what the problems are. To me, the song feels like it was written for yourself, who already understands it, more than to convey something to someone …
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Charlotte's web is a lovely title, and of course benefits from (and contrasts with!) the children's book. I'd like to see a bit more of that in the chorus. You might pinch one of the lines from elsewhere and insert it:
Words, a cu…
Your signature style! Nice catchy rhythm. I like the lyric on this.
You might consider adding one more "All together" on the outro.
Soon as I saw the title I knew what this was going to be about! Very meta 😁 One for we members here on TSF.
Thanks Sid!
Haunting sound! I like this a lot.
The guitar solo felt a bit long to me. Don't know how much control you have over that.
I liked "Many paths now single". It made me feel that someone's world had narrowed down to just the present mome…
Sound quality is good Rob!
Yes, trust is sufficient. There's really no incentive for people to try to be deceptive. Perhaps someone would get get a kick out of fooling people, but it seems a pretty small victory. I would also say that most members have a recognizable style…
Sure. I mean that there are different ways to use AI. Some people only use a prompt: "Write me a song about seagulls on the wing" and the AI writes both Lyrics + Music - this isn't suitable for posting here on TSF. Prompting is its own skill, but…
Strong song, full of pride. I particularly liked:
a man without knowledge is a ship
Without a sail
But "systemic system" felt a little redundant.
I like the music you chose for this as well.
Goo…
You are all entitled to your opinions, but not to derail this thread. This is for feedback on Bill's song. Please stay on track.
If you feel the need to discuss the issue take it to the General Discussion area, though I would say that typic…
Thanks for the suggestion! It has been raised before, and the position we've reached is to treat AI generated music in the same way as lyrics only, which is to include it with all original songs. AI generated lyrics + music with only prompting is…
I interpreted it as someone who has killed his partner in a car crash and is dealing with the consequences. But I don't know if that is correct or not. I wouldn't describe it as clear.
Nice to see the happy ending, I wasn't sure which way this one was going!
I like the birdsong at the start, not sure it needs the effects through the rest of the song though.
This line felt very slightly cramped: "For oh, the sky may …
I like V2, I can see the personal progression there in each verse, but understated, not dominating it. Something to find if you look for it.
Musically, I think Suno really kicks into gear at the Outro, very nice there!
And the whole …
Cool! Looking forward to the next version!
The song really pivots at the outro, and that's a good thing. A "season's passing" theme is nice, but this is more meaningful.
You've got the "family tree" mentioned in v1, and maybe the "sand castles" in V2 refers to childhood passing, but…
That's a harsh one! The bitterness is really coming through in the lyrics.
Some mothers really do go above and beyond, focusing on improving their kids lives, even at the expense of their own.
Structurally, I'm wondering whether you …
Strong rhymes! Otherwise, beyond me.
BTW, Sid told me he's having trouble posting comments at the moment, so don't take it wrong if there's a delay in any response from him
Strong story Sid! I like the lyric.
But I have to say I hate what the AI did to the music. The tone feels all wrong to me, too upbeat, and the prosody is just all over the place.
Should it be mafioso for a male rather than mafiosa?
Very different vibe to other songs of yours I've heard. I like the haunting atmosphere. Musically I think it's strong.
The format seems like a list of all the devils that are here on earth, but I'm not really sure what you're saying about …
So 5 1 1 is 5ft 11in? That through me at first. Though I like how you've linked it with 9 1 1 .
And the emergency on Austin Highway is the narrator feeling alone and helpless?
The "how tall are you?" line does feel a little shallow, w…
That came out very well indeed. Very polished sound, on a strong lyric.
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