Comments
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@DullRoar would you mind including the lyrics with your post please? It makes it so much easier to review! I kn…
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[verse]
She’s a calico cat, she’s a
mystery.
She’s a little bit this and that.
She’s a box full of puzzle pieces.
She’s caucasian, asian and black.
[pre chorus ]
She’s a collage of different races.
That's a wild ride around a mental landscape!
Not sure what I was expecting musically, but this is almost tame compared with the lyric. Are you going for contrast there?
[Verse]
One look and I was smitten
I was mesmerized by her.
She held me in her power.
I couldn’t look away from her.
[Pre chorus]
I had never known such beauty.
Felt skin so satin smooth.
When I ki…
"Fooling Myself, Again" is a lovely title for a Country song.
This one feels really down to earth and real. Especially lines like:
Always on guard is no way for two people to be
But mostly I’m tired of agreeing to disa…
You're definitely getting your message across!!
Some nice lines there. 'A blowup doll your suitor" that made me giggle.
I can enjoy this without needing to agree with you.
That's a moody piece. Strong vocal melody. I can imagine people playing this when they're feeling down.
Nice guitar playing, You might be able to work on the guitar solo for some added punch, and maybe lengthen a little?
Lyrically, I…
That's a different musical vibe! Good on you for trying something new! Enjoyed that funky rhythm.
I'd call it a Christian song. Phrases like 'Living in jubilation" and "This is the day the Father has made" are premised on a Christian perspe…
This one is certainly a lot more accessible. And enjoyable!
By "kindless" do you mean not tied to a specific form?
Love your strumming patterns on this one.
I'd be tempted to take this into a full on blues vibe. I think the lyric might suit that. It sounds fine as it is though!
Enjoyed my listen. 😀
That's probably a good call on shortening it. 5 mins is a long time for this style of song. Good call.
That's an insightful comment Elvis! I believe you are correct. Also, the robots sing in tune!!
@TammyB Sid will be back, though probably not for a couple of months. I miss him too!
Nice job on this version Renee! Enjoyed it!
This is really good.
"Concrete flower" is a lovely image, sprouting out of the of the most difficult ground.
Some lovely lines in there like:
A temporary setback
was the greatest comeback.
And …
This one jumps around a lot Kayla. For example you start with falling asleep at the wheel, but that doesn't seem to connect with any of the latter verses. Then "I don't use sex as a weapon" pops up out of nowhere, and I'm asking myself why is tha…
Strong chorus Renee! One to sing-a-long with. And nice to see something upbeat and inspirational.
I liked how you're singing some of those lines at the end:
Rise
Rise above it, yeah
would be interesti…
That's much clearer Bill. Far easier to understand the lyric. I like the music too, but I go for the more melodic stuff so no surprise there!
Good job Renee! For me at least this is a much better version, and certainly far more relatable.
I applaud anyone who's willing to put in the effort to improve and rewrite, whether it's in my direction or 180 degrees the opposite!!
This one gives me an early Beatles vibe. Love the chord progressions.
Really enjoyed this one Tommy!
Vocals are definitely good enough for a work tape. And a strong lyric.
I'm a bit with @BeatlesFan64
This is just a personal view, but I think songs work better when the listener can put themselves into the story, and I think there's too much of you in this one to allow that to happen. But that is an opinion, not a fact. I'd try sticking with "m…
Calling it as you see it! This one doesn't appeal to me personally, but it's perfectly well constructed as a song.
Some nice picking there!
Big reveal in the 3rd verse. Up till then I wasn't sure if it was going to be a drug song!! Much better this way.
The ending felt a little short - though maybe it's just that particular take. A short picked o…
And isn't it nice to be a published songwriter? Thought occurs, as soon as you post the song anywhere, you're published. How cool is that?
It's a very positive thought, though not the usual meaning of the term. But it …
Thanks!
Good luck to musicians and songwriters everywhere if they receive fair compensation for the use of their music in training AIs.
There's also the issue of whether AI generated music will subsume human efforts over the long run. We'll have to…
Would you mind posting the lyric along with the link to your song RC? makes it easier to follow along and comment.
Like the mood of this. Feels like it could be something played on a boat or on a riverbank.
Enjoyed my listen.
I like the melody you're singing. Nice lilt to it.
"eradicate" didn't bother me when I heard it sung, "Straighten out" could be another alternative if you want one.
I agree on changing "slime" though you want to keep the negative conn…
Main two parties in Australia are called Labour and Liberal, though the Liberals usually form a Coalition with the National party (farmers etc) and are referred to as "The Coalition". Labour would be closer to your Democrats and The Coalition mo…
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