Save your Sorry for Sunday

Lyrics = Me | Music = Suno

another girl song (with attitude)

All feedback appreciated

https://suno.com/s/DWUwSUvto1ut1MMt


[verse 1]

Got back from our couples visit,

You held me and asked forgiveness...

Wrote a to-do list, left it on the table,

If it got done that would be a miracle...

I had to work a double overnighter,

You spent the day parked in that recliner....

Ohhh....

[chorus]

You can save your sorry for Sunday

I’m leaving, ain’t nuthin’ you can do

You can beg but you’re on your own

And i’m never coming back to you

You had your chance on Saturday

Now save your sorry for Sunday

Save it for Sunday.....

[verse 2]

I got home in the afternoon, it was late,

List on the table, sink stacked with plates....

The garbage overflowing, laundry still wet,

Empty cans on the floor, from drowning regret....

Found some boxes and bags for my clothes,

Took everything with me, but left you my hopes....

oohhh....

[chorus]

You can save your sorry for Sunday

I’m leaving, ain’t nuthin’ you can do

You can beg but you’re on your own

And i’m never coming back to you

You had your chance on Saturday

Now save your sorry for Sunday

Save it for Sunday.....

Now save your sorry for Sunday

Save it for Sunday.....

[bridge]

When the plant shut down I made it work,

I paid the bills, you washed down the hurt,

Too many years, doing too many doubles,

Scared to leave, scared you would crumble.

Ohhhh…

[chorus]

You can save your sorry for Sunday

I’m leaving, ain’t nuthin’ you can do

You can beg but you’re on your own

And i’m never coming back to you

You had your chance on Saturday

Now save your sorry for Sunday

Save it for Sunday.....

Now save your sorry for Sunday

Save it for Sunday.....

[outro]

Everything I own is in my pickup

Speed down the road with my chin up

I’ll say my sorries on Sunday

For all the years I gave away

I’ll save my sorries for Sunday…

Save 'em for Sunday....

Comments

  • Tex
    Tex Arkansas

    I'm not sure if this is a break up song or a redneck song🤪he sounds like a redneck to me...

    No nic's from me.... sounds good Muskie...

  • wrote a todo list for whom and by whom

    what's significant about Sunday?

    it seems to me based on this line -You had your chance on Saturday, if she didn't respond on Saturday, that is your answer, she is not sorry to see you go :)

    in the bridge you said that you were afraid to leave that she would crumble, yet now you're leaving. do you not care if she crumbles?

    The music is spot on, really enhances these lyrics.

  • ElvisNash
    ElvisNash Calif
    edited March 18

    It's good , But since you opened the door on religion maybe you give us some on that. What happens on Sunday ?

    If you can drag yourself in for the sermon

    Save your sorrys for Sunday


    He's a loser so drag works ,


    The biggest Sloth on the barstool


    Sprinkle it with funny religion things

  • Tex
    Tex Arkansas

    Hay Bill, you didn't get this one.....she's leaving him because he an lazy ass and not adding anything to the relationship... or that's the way I see it... as far as Sunday goes who the hell knows... I wondered about that myself...

  • i know why, by the way the song reads, she's not begging for him to stay. she doesn't care, if she'd care then she would do the things on the list. this is where his premise falls apart.

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    @bhengen

    @Tex

    @ElvisNash

    So the story I had in mind was:

    They have been having problems (couples visit) cuz he is a good for nothing since his job closed. he "asks forgivness" she gives him a todo list as a chance to prove himself. she goes to work for 16+ hours overnight. comes back the next day (Saturday) he's passed out drunk, the house is a mess and nothing has been done. she's had it, grabs her stuff and leaves. if he want's forgiveness he's going to have to ask God on Sunday because she is done with him. she was scared to leave for years because he would probably drink himself into the dirt with out her to take care of him (scared to leave ,scared you'd crumble). She has to ask for forgiveness(on Sunday) for leaving him and she has to forgive herself for staying for so long. maybe its too much to fit into 1 song?

    the "you can beg..." line i was slightly unsure about, but it sounded good so i left it thinking there was enough context to imply he is always begging for forgiveness cuz he's a loser. I could see if i can come up with something better....

    solid comments guys. thanks.

    you think i should do more work on it to clear it up or simplify the story so its easier to put into a song?

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    ugh.. i noticed my cut and paste doubled up the last 2 lines of the chorus too (on this post). oh well.

  • that's too funny. here i was thinking she was a lush not him :)

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    haha..well it could be 2 girls i guess i didn't specify gender in the song.

    that would be a spin on on things, have the woman be the problem and the singer, putting the guy through the ringer doing everything she can to get him to leave her but he wont.

  • ElvisNash
    ElvisNash Calif
    edited March 18

    Your missing rule one of song writing.... lead to your hook . Save for it for Sunday

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    thanks for the help. i'm going to do a little more work on this to make it more clear.

  • Love the chorus - very strong.

    I thought the message came through loud and clear: save your sorries for the preacher on Sunday you lazy $#ZZ@!

    And it feels like a new way of saying it, or at least an uncommon way. Nice to find a new angle!

    Liked it.

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    Thanks Rainy, glad you like it. 👍

    i'm gong to see how far i can push myself to level this one up. if it goes well i'll post a update.

  • ElvisNash
    ElvisNash Calif
    edited March 19

    No worries just a thought , Been doing this for a long time. It's a strong hook , Just sprinkle a little more on religion in there , not serious stuff , something some pissed off girl would say . Avoid God forgives you but I don't , its been said already

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    Ok did some more work on this. let me know what you think.

    thanks for help.

    https://suno.com/s/TUYvIA1az5iRN1YL


    [intro 4 bars]

    [verse 1]

    No words driving back from the therapist,

    You promised change, I wrote you a to-do list....

    Eyes burned, had a lump in my throat,

    I want to believe you but I don’t....

    Went to work pulled a double overnighter,

    You spent the day parked in that recliner....

    Ohhh....


    [chorus]

    You can save your sorry for Sunday

    I’m leav’n ain' t nuthin’ you can do

    You can beg God for mercy

    ‘Cause I’m through forgivin’ you

    Ya had your chance on Saturday

    Now save your sorry for Sunday

    Save it for Sunday.....


    [verse 2]

    Drug myself inside after working late 

    Found your list stuck in the dirty plates

    Snoring, got cans around you like a nest 

    I could taste my tears mixed with sweat

    Packed up boxes and bags for my clothes 

    Took everything , but left behind my hopes

    oohhh....


    [chorus]

    You can save your sorry for Sunday

    I’m leav’n ain' t nuthin’ you can do

    You can beg God for mercy

    ‘Cause I’m through forgivin’ you

    Ya had your chance on Saturday

    Now save your sorry for Sunday

    Save it for Sunday......


    [bridge]

    When the plant shut down you took the blame

    I paid the bills, you washed down the shame

    Too many years, too many doubles

    Scared to leave, scared you’d crumble

    Ohhhh…


    [chorus]

    You can save your sorry for Sunday

    I’m leav’n ain' t nuthin’ you can do

    You can beg God for mercy

    ‘Cause I’m through forgivin’ you

    Ya had your chance on Saturday

    Now save your sorry for Sunday

    Save it for Sunday.....


    [outro]

    Everything I own is in my pickup

    Speed down the road with my chin up

    I’ll say my sorries on Sunday

    For all the years I gave away

    I’ll save my sorries for Sunday…

    Save 'em for Sunday....

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    haha, well glad i didn't do that. funny i did use "i don't" but in a different spot.

  • I think you've tightened this up, lost the more neutral phrases to make everything sharp.

    I particularly like "I want to believe you but I don’t...." in the new v1

    On this one I'd use part of each version you have to make: "Took everything, but left you my hopes...."

    Solid improvement.

  • ElvisNash
    ElvisNash Calif
    edited March 23

    I think you're still not leading to your hook with only God in chorus . A few lines in verses could be reworked with church things

    No words driving back from the preacher . The gospel truth I don't believe you

    “Everything I own’s in my pickup at the church door

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    i get what you mean.

    Do you think it would be enough to change the first line v1 to => No words driving back from the church therapist

    verse 2

    Drug myself inside after working late 

    Found your list stuck in the dirty plates

    Snoring, got cans around you like a nest 

    Head bent, I prayed for strength as I wept

    Packed up boxes and bags for my clothes 

    Took everything , but left behind my hopes

    ?

  • ElvisNash
    ElvisNash Calif
    edited March 24

    Thats a start , but you need more references to point to your hook to pay it off  church therapist

    Nothing after that points to you hook . ok you got prayed , Again you opened the door with hook on save it for Sunday

  • ElvisNash
    ElvisNash Calif
    edited March 24

    Its a real simple rule , you can't talk about trucks in the verses than talk about a apple in chorus

    You talk about the apple without saying the word apple in verses, and then say apple in chorus

    Now we know the song is about apples


    I'm so pissed off you fell from grace

    Grace is a bullet point that leads to your hook

  • MuskieBait44
    MuskieBait44 Great White North

    thanks 👍️

    i'll see what i can come up with to make that work..

  • ElvisNash
    ElvisNash Calif
    edited March 24

    You can do it , it's easy . Only one problem its the obvious angle , But I can''t see where else you can go

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