There's a world outside my window

KatiesPRIDE

Oh I'm lost in my own thoughts and memories

the river I had, run dry 

I put my hands to the net curtains 

that's when I start to cry 

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't find it no more 

there are days, when the sun don't shine no more 

and the feelings are still so raw

I still see you walking down the street 

all a, thirty years gone by

the last time, I saw my special one 

I didn't know you would die

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't find it no more 

there are days, when the sun don't shine no more 

and the feelings are still so raw

When the police, came knocking at my door

I knew deep down, the truth 

someone had taken, my baby girl

Knocked down my baby, Ruth

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't find it no more 

there are days, when the sun don't shine no more 

and the feelings are still so raw

how am I supposed, to move on

when I don't know, where she is

her friends all have children, of their own

I can't look at her best friend Liz

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't find it no more 

there are days, when the sun don't shine no more 

and the feelings are still so raw

how am I supposed, to move on

when I don't know, where she is

how am I supposed, to move on

when I don't know, where she is

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't find it no more 

there are days, when the sun don't shine no more 

and the feelings are still so raw

how am I supposed, to move on

when I don't know, where she is

how am I supposed, to move on

when I don't know, where she is ?

how am I supposed, to move on

when I don't know, when I don't know 

where she is ?

RainyDayMan

I like this overall. It's deeply sad in a restrained, isolated kind of way.

The loss of a child must be heartbreaking, and life-changing, and you've captured a sense of that.

I like how you start with the image of the net curtains, which leads into the "window" in the chorus.

As a suggestion, you might try varying this line in the chorus:

but I can't find it no more 

with things like "I can't reach it" or even "I don't want it", just to add a little variation as the song progresses.

I would probably change "there are days, when the sun don't shine no more" to just "there are days, when the sun don't shine"  to avoid the rhyme, which will emphasize it in the lines above and below. But it may depend on how it is set to music.

I'm not a fan of "Ruth" and "Liz". To me they feel like they've been forced in there to make the rhymes work, and feel unnatural.

But overall it's a poignant and moving lyric.

KatiesPRIDE

Hi Owen, you were right about forcing the rhyme. I've had another go at it and taken some of your other advice on board.

Katie

V1

I'm lost in my own thoughts and memories

the river I had, run dry 

I put my hands to the net curtains 

that's when I start to cry 

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't find it no more 

there are days, when the sun don't shine

and the feelings are still so raw

V2

I still see you walking down the street 

all a, thirty years gone by

the last time, I saw my special one 

I didn't know you would die

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I question, what's it all for ?

there are days, when the sun don't shine

and the feelings are still so raw

V3

When the police, came knocking at my door

I knew deep down, you'd died

A mother instinct tells her so

my soul forever cries

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't go out, the door

there are days, when the sun don't shine

and the feelings are still so raw

V4

I'll never be able, move on

cos that would feel, so wrong

so I sit all day, by the window

the nights, are often long

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't, reach no more

there are days, when the sun don't shine

and the feelings are still so raw

V5

her friends have children, of their own

I'm pleased for them, I am

but question why ? God had to take away

my previous little lamb

Chorus

There's a world outside my window 

but I can't find it no more 

there are days, when the sun don't shine

and the feelings are still so raw

( Repeat chorus )

RainyDayMan

I like the new version!

And Kudos for being ready to re-write. Some people find that difficult.