After You
I'm back with another show tune style piece, which seems to be the trend for me of late. I went with an electric piano this time as a rhythm instrument, which I felt might give it more of a cozy vibe? Not too many harmonies in this one, though I'm definitely considering adding more of them. The one thing I'm not really sure about is the vocal that introduces each verse, I used a telephone / radio type effect for that one, to differentiate it from the main vocal, but maybe it's too far out there? As always, I'm dying to know what y'all think.
Music and Lyrics by Tommy L. Day and the Runaways
(Introduction)
The difference is clear, everybody can tell
Just a week ago, things were going so well
Yet simply removing you from the mixture
Leaves me a far less rosy picture
(v1)
Before you
Skies were gloomy, no sunlight came to me
I was hopeless in every way
I was sleepwalking through each day, before you
(v2)
When I found you
My life started all over, I was living in clover
Now my reasons to dream are few
How can I love again, after you?
(Bridge)
I can see you in my mind, the traces of our love remain in every place I go
I can feel you in my heart, the faded warmth of your embrace still torments me so
Please come home, I’m so alone
And I know I can’t carry on
(v3)
After you
Stormy clouds cry their tears, days have turned into years
It’s no use pining like I do
But I can’t love again, after you
(Instrumental bridge)
(v3)
(Coda)
After you
Comments
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The Beatles first album! Right down to the production style. Strong vocals and again some nice chord shifts too. A great track.😀
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@ChrisPrice Hey Chris, thanks for checking it out! I've always loved how the Beatles did some jazzy songs on their early albums like Ask Me Why, Till There Was You, If I Fell etc., I get so much inspiration from those songs in my own writing.
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I absolutely love listening to your songs, they are so good, it just takes me back to better days.
Your right, the telephone distracts but worth the try. Also agree to add more harmony, that;s your signature.
When I open the site and see a load of submissions, yours is the first I open, with good reason.
Sid
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These lyrics are good!
Stormy clouds cry their tears/days have turned into years. Epic is I ever heard a lyric.
Not much into the show tune genre but the wording intro as your mentioned seems to be a bit ethereal for the song.
I see this as more of a CW or having more solemn music to it.
Still the lyrics are amazing!1 -
Love that bridge! The whole song is great, but I particularly enjoyed that.
Excellent production as always!
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The truth is that it sounds so sweet and the tempo and rhythm enter the ear so easily, they sound innocent. It has been a very pleasant listen, I really like the lyrics. @BeatlesFan64
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@sidshovel Thanks so much for the kind words!! I have to say I’m absolutely honored to hear that you always go for my songs first when you see them. I always look for yours too since you have a knack for amazing lyrics.
@prysmatyk Thanks so much! I’ll tell you a secret… that’s my favorite line too haha. The original was a lot more clunky, and it took me some time to come up with the right phrasing, but I’m glad it worked out in the end. Hm…I could hear a country-style arrangement. I think melancholy lyrics always work well in that genre. Despite being from Texas though, I don’t quite have the twang :p.
@RainyDayMan Thanks as always RDM, I always appreciate the kind words. And the bridge was a lot of fun to write. Sometimes it can be a struggle to come up with a contrasting section, but with this one, it just sort of fell into place as far as the chords and melody, I’m happy with how it turned out and I’m glad you liked it too! 🙂
@MoraAmaroLaLoba Gracias Mora, I’m glad you enjoyed it!0
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