Dances For The Moon
Hi Guys, I think this was my first post on the old site. It's not metal! š I thought I'd have a go at the vocals for it. I don't think they are all that good to be frank. But they are a lot better than the original and I wish I had the skill to double track them. It's mostly the lyrics and the arrangement I'm looking at. The production side not so much, as it's all an experiement. But, any advice is good advice and will be much appreciated.
https://soundcloud.com/billy_lunch_money/dances-for-the-moon
Copyright 2018 Oz Clarke.
Intro
Oh, she dances for the moon. Hear a whisper in the wind.
Oh, she dances for the moon.
Verse 1
Her eyes just full of stars and barefoot on the hills.
The joy in her face is for her and the moon.
Chorus
Oh, she dances for the moon. Hear a whisper in the wind.
Oh, she dances for the moon. For the moon and no-one else.
Oh, she dances for the moon.
Verse 2
Her mind just full of scars. Her only friend's the moon.
With a dance of ease and grace. Like the flowers in full bloom.
Chorus
Verse 3
She adored from afar, They'll be together soon
As she feels the warm embrace with her love for the moon.
Bridge(Chorus X2)
Outro
Iām the man in the moon!
Comments
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@Billy_Lunch_Money wrote: It's mostly the lyrics and the arrangement I'm looking at.
I think you've written a good set of lyrics that convey the song's concept while creatively leaving some aspects to the reader's/listener's imagination. I liked the arrangement as well. Everything seems to flow and fit well together. I seem to vaguely recall this song from the original forum. It's good that you've updated it and brought it here to share. Good title too!
I'm not sure I understood the meaning of this line:
She adored from afar, They'll be together soon
She adored the moon from afar? She is adored from afar? Anyway, good stuff! š
Cheers,
Joseph
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Oh a typo that should be "She's adored..."
Thanks!
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Nice, smooth read0
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This is nice. I'm liking the acoustic guitar..almost a classical feel to the arpeggios. Nice orchestral sounds too. Nothing wrong with the lyrics or the vocals imo..maybe the intro voice (right at the start) is a bit awkward on the ear - I dunno. But I played this right through and really enjoyed it.š
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@ChrisPrice I had another listen to it. It's not as "Out of tune" as I originally remembered? You're right about the "awkward" bit. I will get around to editing that bit out. Oh I used Spitfire Audio's BBC Orchestra plug-in. It's free and I love it.
Incidently, what do you use on your vocal chain, I'm still getting alot of hiss from my setup.
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I use a Rode NT1 condenser - one of the older white ones. Best mic I've owned - brilliant without breaking the bank. That is fed through an Art TubeMP mic preamp and into my Mackie Onyx Blackbird Firewire audio interface. My DAW is Cubase 12 and I use the Waves CLA Vocal plugin on pretty much all my vox. I'll sometimes use one of the vst de-essers that come with Cubase. My setup is built around a 2012 Mac Pro 5,1.. It's quite a powerful system but most of it was bought 2nd hand and so not too expensive.
Getting rid of unwanted sibilance on my vocals has always been a problem for me - I tend to over-emphasise my s and t's in particular. I'm still trying to find a practical way of fixing that without going through the individual vocal tracks and editing it out manually...that method works but takes forever. Using a de-sser takes me half the way there. Someone suggested that I change the way I sing, but that's hard when you're trying to sing with a bit of soul.
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I wonder if I should set up a discussion on signal chains and open it up to everybody? It's always interesting to know what other person are using for vocals and what issue they may have!
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@ChrisPrice wrote: "Getting rid of unwanted sibilance on my vocals has always been a problem for me - I tend to over-emphasise my s and t's in particular."
Chris, I think your tracks are very high quality and you always have excellent production and clear sound. I've never noticed any sibilance issues in your songs. I address sibilance issues by zooming in to the max on each individual over-dubbed vocal track to the problem area. I often find that when I have multiple vocal overdubs, there are very slight time variations and offsets between the tracks. If i have six vocal overdubs, for example, there may be three that are very close to synchronicity. If I'm happy with those, I will fully synchronize those sections of the tracks and mute the others that were farther out of sync (e.g., set the volume to 0 for the endings of those, and adjust the volume a little higher on the synced parts of the desirable tracks to compensate). Sometimes, if an 'ess' or 'tee' is causing a significant sibilance issue, I will set and adjust a quick fadeout on the end of the word until the problem disappears. Sometimes, I'm pleased with an "ess" ending for a word in one part of a song, but unhappy with an 'ess' ending elsewhere in the song. In those cases, I copy the good 'ess' ending and use it to replace the bad 'ess' ending elsewhere, assuming the meter and pitch are the same. That usually completely solves the issue and sounds perfectly natural. Often there is a fine line between carrying a lyric too far and causing a sibilance issue, and ending it too abruptly and leaving the word sounding as though it's 'cut off'. Of course, we can also continue singing it till we nail it. Right? LOL! Just my opinion and two cents (or shillings)! š
Cheers,
Joseph
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@ChrisPrice
Sibilance? I just went and listened to a few of your songs again. Your vocal style is brite, they always sound joyful and full of character.Ā I like them just the way they are!
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Thanks for kind words about my songs. I see you've set up a discussion on the subject. I'll be interested to see how others go about it.š
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Howdy, Stranger!