Another Side To Me
I wrote this during FAWM. I kind of like it but understand it's not for everyone. I also like the meaning in the change of the chorus each time but wonder if it ruins the 'chorus'.
No music, so changes are easier. Happy to hear all thoughts :)
Another Side To Me
V1
Deadly is the night
When vermin roam the streets
But who's hunting who
When the two of us meet
V2
You have the muscles
And half a foot on me
I look like a sheep
But inside lies a beast
Chorus 1
You may think I'm weak
But, I won't run and hide
There's another side to me
Yes, another side to me
Just waiting to break free
V3
You put up your dukes
Then let your guard down
A fatal mistake
On mortal battle ground
Chorus 2
You may think I'm weak
But, I'm Jekyll and Hyde
There's another side to me
Yes, another side to me
A metamorphosis
Bridge
Tail like a whip
To take down the prey
Claws made to grip
So he can't get away
Teeth built to rip
No he won't get away
Chorus 3
You may think I'm weak
But, you should run and hide
There's another side to me
Yes, another side to me
I'm a supernatural species
V4
Deadly is the night
When vermin roam the streets
I am the hunter
And you are the meat
Comments
-
Never heard of FAWM. Is vermin the right word ? I get the hook and meaning two different sides to all of us , So your hunting Vermin ? Explain what your going after please
0 -
Very cool lyrics, Andrea! I like the title, the theme, and the imagery it evokes throughout. Good stuff! I hope you develop it and set it to music. 😀
My favorite lines were:
You may think I'm weak But, I'm Jekyll and Hyde There's another side to me Yes, another side to me
Nice work! 😀
1 -
I guess its like a revenge song , going after vermin , I don't know if your vermin
0 -
@ElvisNash, I am using the word 'vermin' in this context "people perceived as despicable and as causing problems for the rest of society".
Nighttime is usually when the when towns/cities are more dangerous. The riff raff are out on the prowl and these two 'bad' guys happen to cross paths. Sizing each other up for a fight, one guy looks like he can easily take the other, but there is much he doesn't know...
I imagine a hard rock or metal song for these lyrics.
FAWM is February Writing Month. It is a forum that you can join to embrace the challenge to write 14 songs/lyrics in 28 days. It is a supportive community. Plenty of collaboration for those who are interested, and a fun way to push yourself and meet others.
50/90 is similar but is more relaxed. It begins July 4th with the challenge to write 50 songs/lyrics in 90 days. It's a challenge and not a requirement. Many don't make the numbers, and that is cool. It's really about getting you to write more that you would have if you didn't join. https://FAWM.org
1 -
Thanks Joseph. I always appreciate your positive and supportive comments :)
I think it calls for some hard rock or metal treatment. I need to find a musician who makes this kind of music!
1 -
You're very welcome! Thanks for sharing your work with us. I look forward to hearing the next stage of your song's development! 😀
1 -
Ok gottca , 2 vermin meet , I was taking it as you, So you're acting in the song as vermin
i guess alarms bells went off on the unfavorably light on being you in the song
0 -
I didn't really pick up on the message I'm afraid. I guess I took it too literally and thought it might be a cat vs mouse thing. I think it's the bridge that took me that way. But different people will interpret it individually.
I can imagine it working in the hard rock / metal style you have in mind. The rhythm of it feels good.
I like it because it's different, and makes you wonder and interpret.
0 -
Hola @Andrea
I really like your lyrics, direct, detailing the non motion scene in the dark of the street and of his mind, depicting his terrible ways to kill, hunter and prey changing their role without the victim noticing it!!
Heavy Metal can work well but also hypnotic music, keeping the dark tension, waves of silent adrenaline vibrating from time to time wrapping the atmosphere .. a deep beat but slow, ... bland bland Oh, I like your darkness You inspired me!!!
0 -
Another side to you indeed @Andrea - I really like these lyrics and the bite they have. As you say, something heavy would suit this down to the ground. I was wondering of suggesting the obvious 'juxtapose the lyrics and music' by setting it to the muppets theme tune (J/K but you know what I mean) but I actually think these should be played 'straight'.
A lyric that conjures up the images and sensations with ease. Very impressive.
CCB
1 -
I suppose you bring up a good point. Would the POV being first person discourage someone from wanting to sing this song? I would hope not, but it is possible.
0 -
@RainyDayMan , Thanks for your feedback. I am fine if the lyrics are interpreted in different ways. There isn't a message I want to convey, just lyrics for 'fun' :)
@MoraAmaroLaLoba , Thanks so much for your comments. I really love the description of your idea for music to go along with these lyrics. It feels intense - A really cool idea! I am so happy that you were inspired by these lyrics. That is a wonderful compliment :)
@CorkingCrackBand , Thanks for your thoughtful and positive feedback. I tend to head for metal because I like it, but I love the idea from both you and Mora to try a different style for the lyrics. Musicians have such great ideas! I would be very interested to hear the combination together.
1
Howdy, Stranger!