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 Posted: Sun Mar 21st, 2021 12:30 am
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Marchwind
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Recorded on my i-Phone a few days before Valentine's Day as a tribute to my wife. I'm hoping to get my voice back in some kind of shape, but it's been years. I'm taking online lessons on the uke and hope to be better at the independence of singing and playing, but we can only start where we are. Anyway, please let me know what you think works and what needs the most attention. Thanks!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYiWKVRKbWM


I’ve tried at least a hundred times to tell you how I feel
I’ve searched to find the perfect words to show you this is real
I speak my mind, but you do not hear
I’ve tried to make it very clear
tell me what else can I do
to make this point to you…(oh, I love you)


I’ve tried at least a hundred times to tell you how I feel
I’ve searched to find the perfect words to show you this is real
you’re in my heart, but you’re out of reach
just like a wave upon the beach
you’re here and then you’re gone
and I just can’t hold on…(hold on to you)


There must be something I can say to prove my heart is true
a word that will chase your doubts away and turn your gray skies blue
this is not some commonplace
infatuation with a pretty face
still, you don’t know it’s true
all I want is you…(all I want is you)


Copr. 2020, Bruce Taylor.

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 Posted: Sun Mar 21st, 2021 11:19 am
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RainyDayMan
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I like it Bruce! Some nice chord progressions, and I like flow of the lyric.

The little pause before Oh how I love you (etc) works very well.

I don't think uke is the ideal accompaniment for this one, so the fact that it already shines with just the uke speaks well of the music to my mind.

Good stuff! :)



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 Posted: Sun Mar 21st, 2021 12:19 pm
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Marchwind
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Thanks for the kind words. For now all I've got to work with is the uke. (I am a recovering drummer and I just don't hear kick, snare and hats with this.) Just for the sake of broadening my imagination, what kind of instrumentation do you hear?

Last edited on Sun Mar 21st, 2021 12:20 pm by Marchwind

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 Posted: Sun Mar 21st, 2021 04:51 pm
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echo insider
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great share. think it was great. i like the chord progression as well. i liked the ukelele. but it could work also with piano, or even an orchestration with horns and such, or a jazz kinda thing with a stand-up bass. nice work. cheers



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 Posted: Sun Mar 21st, 2021 07:01 pm
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moptop
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Bruce,

I like this very much. It has a bit of a "Broadway" musical style flare to it. Not a thing wrong with your voice and it looks like you're mastering that uke quite well.

Looking forward to hearing more. Thanks for sharing.



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 Posted: Sun Mar 21st, 2021 08:24 pm
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Al Mac
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Nice song, and weirdly I was just thinking about maybe a brass accompaniment, maybe a deep horn carrying the bass - certainly on that last bit of the chorus run. Well written, and well performed.
I also hear piano, and banjo.

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 Posted: Sun Mar 21st, 2021 09:17 pm
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RainyDayMan
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Marchwind wrote:
Just for the sake of broadening my imagination, what kind of instrumentation do you hear?
Synth and a strong bass line. I can imagine drums there too, though not dominant.



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 Posted: Mon Mar 22nd, 2021 11:59 pm
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ChrisPrice
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I love this. A really nice vocal and stripped back, honest approach. I too can imagine a fuller arrangement but I wouldn't want to spoil this. A lovely tribute to your good lady.



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 Posted: Tue Mar 23rd, 2021 11:14 am
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Marchwind
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Thanks to all for the replies. They have been very encouraging. Clearly I have more work to do when it comes to arranging. Having heard what I have so far on TSF I'm honored to be hanging with you guys.

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 Posted: Wed Mar 24th, 2021 05:46 pm
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Andrea
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Hi Bruce. Really nice first post. If I had to make a suggestion, I would like to hear the end lines in parenthesis repeated in each verse. You did this in V3, but it would be nice in all of them. A bridge would add interest. A change up/break from the melody would give you the well known AABA structure too.

Very enjoyable song :)



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 Posted: Fri Mar 26th, 2021 02:06 pm
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Emilygraymusic
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This is really cool! I like the uke although I agree with everyone else. I feel like this needs a full band behind it.
I really like the song though and the chords are really interesting. Great job!



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