Now You're Gone
This is another mood song (and likely the last!) done in F6/b9 open tuning. I wanted to have three songs so I could do a set at my local Open Mic without changing tunings on the guitar mid-way!!
Now You're Gone
© 2023 Owen Hovenden
Link: https://soundcloud.com/rainydayman/now-youre-gone
Sitting in the corner of the night café
With a cold cup of coffee in my palm
And the waitress wants to know if I'll order yet
Or am I waiting for someone else to come
I'm not waiting here for anyone
Just remembering things long past and done
Tonight I'll sit here thinking of you
Now you're gone
The streets are all empty as I head outside
Paper bags tossing in the wind
Reflections, echoes, of another time and place
Fill my eyes make my vision swim
I'm not waiting here for anything
Just remembering things long past and done
Tonight I'll walk through my memories
Now you're gone
Familiar shadows as I make my way back home
Retracing all my might have beens
To a house crammed full of solitude
Waiting for a new life to begin
I'm not waiting here anymore
Just remembering things long past and done
Tomorrow I'll start on a different path
Now you're gone
Comments
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Hi Owen,
Quite sad, but this is called healing as well.
Remembering and cherishing special moments are truly full of different emotions.
Love the melody and the way you sang this beautiful song!!!
So full of emotions, and so full of hope!!!
Love this recording.
Rene
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Hi Dan, strong lyrics that resonate. I can see the pictures you're painting with your words...sad but pretty impressing...it leaves a mark when the last chord has faded.
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I'd endorse it. So real when you get that feeling. It's hard to feel for something to write a song about but when you get it it's magical!
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@ReneAsologuitar Yes, some healing there - an acceptance of loss and a willingness to move on. Thanks for checking it out!
@StefPo Appreciate the comment! Always good when the visuals come through clearly.
@BigTexasMike I'm glad you can relate. Trying to stir the emotions of the listener.
Thanks for the listen and the comments, guys! 😀
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A lovely song Owen. The chorus is really sad as it's meant to be. There's some great chord work here..that open tuning really works for you. No crits at all from me, I think this is fabulous. 😀
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Hey Owen,
I do like it a lot. Especially the chorus gives me the feeling that I m secretly following you around and observe. It reaches deep. Well done!
RK0 -
You've composed another nice and melancholy tune, Owen. Your signature guitar work is instantly recognizable. Smooth! Nice vocals too. I enjoyed it! My favorite lyrics were hard to pick, but I think I liked these lines the best....
I'm not waiting here for anything
Just remembering things long past and done
Tonight I'll walk through my memories
Now you're gone
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Been there!
Great lyric. The visual images are very strong and the slight variation in the first line of the chorus creates a feeling of progression. One suggestion. How about changing "To a house crammed full of solitude" to "To a house crammed full of emptiness?" The apparent contradiction of being full of emptiness might add something.
I like the melody too. You sing it well, but the way it's recorded you sound a bit distant or as if you are in a huge empty hall. Maybe a little less reverb?
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Thanks all! Love getting the feedback!
@OnlyGavin I'll have a play with "emptiness" and see how it feels. I like "solitude" as a word, but you make a good point about the contrasting meanings. And I think you're right on the vocals, I can pull back a bit there. Thanks for the suggestions! 😀
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Hi Owen,
I think this song is beautifully melancholic. We can all relate to loss and I feel the pain because it rings true. You are sharing something so personal and I admire you for it. I can see this song as a painting where there is rain, a cafe, a lone sitter. You really captured something special.
Cheers,
HV
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Owen,
Good vibe. The talking/singing needs to be revisited. Heavy Vocal reverb. Well written song. Find a singer to perform....
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@RainyDayMan I like the vibe a lot. It really lives in that melancholy space through the whole thing and the lyrics paint a clear picture. The vocal performance reminds me kind of a mix of Colin Hay and Roger Waters. If I was to offer any critique it would be to maybe cut back on the reverb a bit but this is real nice. Good job!
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Beautiful contemplative piece. Brilliant songwriting. I don't quite know if the vocal needs quite the amount of reverb/chorusing you have on it. It does lend to the "lonely" feel but a slightly dryer vocal might sound a bit better. Don't know. It's an artistic thing but I do enjoy the tune.
😀John B
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Thanks everyone! Yes the reverb can definitely be wound back a little
@highvibrational Paulina This isn't based on personal experience, but if you thought it was I'll take that as a compliment.
@Autopart101 Joe It would be lovely to hear someone else sing it, but I won't be paying for that, so it likely won't happen!
@brucetangmusic Thanks Bruce. Appreciate you giving it a listen!
@Johnb68 Thank you! Yes the reverb is overdone!
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Hi @RainyDayMan
Your user name suits the song!
A very melancholy song with a great evocative lyric. I love the simple vocal delivery - a man who’s no energy left. Similarly, the paired back arrangement plays perfectly to the lyric. A man enveloped by a hollow emptiness.
Not a criticism but I wonder what it would have sounded like to have that great guitar part played on an acoustic?
Top song - thanks for sharing.
CCB0 -
Thanks for the suggestion @CorkingCrackBand ! Yes an acoustic guitar would likely work very well here. Glad you liked it!
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Nice version on an age old theme. The lyrics are well structured, good consistent rhyming, good repeating hook.
I would just spice the melody up a little.
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@Songbird52 Thanks for the input! Appreciated 😀
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Hola Owen
It is a beautiful song although very sad, the guitar and the bass wrap up very well that atmosphere that surrounds your story, the loneliness that walks through the memory picking here and there the flowers that still resist oblivion. Very beautiful, I love this part its melody
I'm not waiting here for anyone
Just remembering .......
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This is very sad but in a lovely way. The images you paint make this feel very real and I easily connect with this character. The only image that strikes me somewhat odd is the paper bags tossing in the wind. Scraps of paper or leaves feel more real to me. Leaves could possibly imply a change or amount of time too.
Your playing and vocal delivery impart the perfect mood to go along with the lyrics. I really like it.
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@MoraAmaroLaLoba Yes, that's my favorite part too.
@Andrea Yes, "paper bags" does feel a bit out. Maybe "scattered leaves" or "withered leaves" might fit there. I might try "scattered leaves tumbling in the wind". Thanks for the suggestion!
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We all have our up's and down's............you brought me to one of my most depressing low's........................thanks a lot 😎
Well written............probably on a rainy Monday.
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Sounds like you found it too relatable! Always appreciate a listen and a comment, thank you!
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Thats a odd tuning , very cool song
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great job with setting a mood/place. the singing/lyrics are vulnerable and honest. i struggle with that part of writing so kudos!
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@ElvisNash and @jrandolph Thanks for taking the time to listen and comment. Appreciated :)
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Nice to hear your songs. Always tasteful and to the point. Glad you are still moderating here. I am looking forward sharing some of my new songs here.
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Good to see you here TBG! Thanks for checking it out 😀
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Am quite familiar with love gone or disappeared songs - have written many of them. This is right on the mark without being excessively maudlin. Very good vocal.
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Thank you! And welcome to the forum
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Howdy, Stranger!