Old friend - Song

Here is the song to the lyrics, sorry for the bad quality. I'm working on it...:-)
Comments
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link seems not to work, sorry but pls try this one:
https://soundclick.com/r/s8nuy1
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Hi Stefan. I thought it might be helpful to have the lyrics here so that people can comment on the song as a whole, so I took the liberty of pasting them below from your original post of just the lyrics. I hope you don't mind. You might prefer to add them to your post above.
There's a nice gentle folk vibe here that complements the lyric well. It's a rough recording - which is fine since there's not much point in getting suggestions that you can't implement because the song is already produced - but I think you deliver it well. A couple of grammatical and pronunciation suggestions...
You pronounce the "v" of "vapor" as a "w." That sounds a bit strange.
"and I have yet to learn" means that you have not yet learned that all his plans are blown. I don't think that's what you mean. You could change it to "I have come to learn" or something, but that sounds a bit clumsy and unnatural. How about something like this
"and the flame that used to burn
so brightly blew out and all those plans are gone"
I've got a couple of suggestions for the last verse and refrain, as shown below in bold type. The first one is grammatical. The ones at the end are to make it easier to sing by taking out the unnecessary word "the" before "others."
Old friend, I wish we'd had the time
To share our thoughts on life and what may lay beyond
I know the pain will grow and stay
and only slowly fade away
as you will leave a void no song can fill with rhyme
Refrain
Old friend, all what's left for me to do
To write this song alas this humble little tune
To tell your tale of life and death
from birth till your last breath
to tell others of the story that's been you
to remind others of the story that's been you
"OLD FRIEND"
by Stefan Portune
Old friend, thought I'd hear from you again
last time we spoke was brief and in a rush
now I've heard the news today
that you have passed away
and I'm all out of words for now and then
Old friend, last time we spoke by phone
your plans were full of music, rhymes and sound
now your journey took a turn
and I have yet to learn
that all your future plans now have been blown
Refrain
Life is but a vapor, life is precious, life is fragile,
and we must redeem the time that we were given
Life's never what's expected, best laid plans are somehow agile
and we only pass the time whilst we are driven
Old friend, i'd wished we've had the time
To share our thoughts on life and what may lay beyond
I know the pain will grow and stay
and only slowly fade away
as you will leave a void a song can barely rhyme
Refrain
Old friend, all what's left for me to do
To write this song alas this humble little tune
To tell your tale of life and death
early from birth till your last breath
to tell the others of the story that's been you
to remind the others of the story that's been you
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That's great Gavin!
thx so much for the ideas. That is exactly what I was hoping for.
I already changed that in the verses/lyrics.
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Howdy, Stranger!