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Boys Will Be Boys
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 Posted: Fri Jan 14th, 2022 06:30 pm
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songwriter147
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Joined: Fri Jan 14th, 2022
Location: Massachusetts USA
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Favorite Artist: Taylor Swift
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Boys will be boys
is what I've always heard said
They crawl through the night
searching for a different bed
Messy covers in the morning,
the sun has only just touched the sky
They disappear in silence
not even as much as a goodbye.

Now she met him as a boy,
she was the girl next door
Each Summer they'd move in
just like every time before
But this one was different,
the first time he caught her eye,
he seemed pretty quiet
and definitely shy

He was scared to admit it
and also a little scared of me,
that first night on the dock
they never guessed what would be

One kiss had him buzzin'
oh he couldn't get enough,
they never believed
that times could get tough
two children in love,
so many nights spent on that boat
but Summers all die
and they couldn't stay afloat.

Chorus:
Boys will be boys
and there's no harm in that
but girls soon grow up,
they have no time for that!
These boys will soon realize
how they've waited too long,
cuz the good ones don't stick around,
they'll soon be long gone

Well now Summers do end
but they always come again,
hes my ex, hes my neighbor
but could never just be my friend
But something was different
this time around
His heart had gone missing,
it didn't wanna be found

At least not by me,
but someone fresh and new,
see when he brought her around
I didn't know what to do!
Now this girl she was pretty,
I mean she lived at the gym.
She certainly stood out
and was crazy for him


He liked her puffed hair
and her fake bed tan
Maybe he even liked
how all the other girls ran
He thought she was bad,
in the best possible way
Boys will be boys
is what i've always heard them say

Chorus repeats

Hook:
24-years-old now,
he wears a suite and tie
100 dollar haircut
to be a suave city guy
He lives for the weekends,
rips them back with the boys
"girlfriend?" he chuckles,
"ive had enough of that noise!"
Finger gun shot in hand,
he points it up to the lights
wakes up dazed and confused,
not sure where he spent the night
"Busy day" he explains
as he zips up his pants
then he closes her door,
doesn't even take a second glance
But boys will be boys
thats what they all say,
so we laugh it all off,
chalk it up to them being this way

Now this boy that I knew,
they'd all say he's grown up
but can this really be true,
if someone's incapable of love?
That beach he once knew,
well he hates it there now
You'd probably never see him,
not even know he's in town

But when he does roll through,
he's never with anyone new
He pulls out his phone says,
"I wanna rip some with you"
So she walks down her stairs
like so many times before
When he sees her he remembers
why he can never ignore
She sees right through him,
knows exactly who he is
which is why hes still scared,
just like a little kid

Chorus repeats

End Chorus:
So i will not stop you
would never get in your way
I hope you find comfort
in the beds where you lay
but different beds start growing colder
and you'll only keep growing older
but boys will be boys
and some always stay that way



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 Posted: Sat Jan 15th, 2022 10:05 pm
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RainyDayMan
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Joined: Thu May 17th, 2007
Location: Stratford, Australia
Posts: 7736
Favorite Artist: James Taylor, Cat Stevens, Joni Mitchell
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I like the complexity of the story. It isn't a "he meets her and everything changes for the better" deal. There's a messiness to it, the way they keep interweaving that feels more natural and real.

You switch between 3rd person (she) and 1st person (I). I think it would be better to stay mostly in one or the other. Personally I found the "I" more powerful.

In the second verse you move from specific to general to specific which could confuse some people.
So she met him as a boy, then each summer they'd move in, which could mean he and she, or boys in general. Only when we get to "but this one is different" is it clear it's boys in general. You might try resequencing those lines to start general then go specific. More like:
Each Summer they'd move in
just like every time before
But this one was different,
the first time he caught her eye,
Now she met him as a boy,
she was the girl next door
he seemed pretty quiet
and definitely shy


It looks like it might be a long song, and takes a while before it hits the chorus. Those might be factors if you were trying to pitch it commercially - otherwise they don't matter at all!

Held my attention and kept me interested throughout to see where it was going.



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 Posted: Tue Jan 18th, 2022 05:30 pm
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3rd Post
Gary E. Andrews
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Joined: Mon Jul 9th, 2007
Location: Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
Posts: 40
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It looks too long for a Song. It's hard to keep listeners paying attention, 'hooked', that long.
How long does it take you to get to the Chorus?
If that Change of dynamics, renewing listener Hook Factor, takes longer than one minute you risk losing them to their own thoughts. Human attention span or something.
That switch of the Singer-Character telling the story to the audience is problematic, another possible confusion that could lose listener interest.

"Boys Will Be Boys" copyright 2022 by Songwriter147.

Boys Will Be Boys,
is what I've always heard said. (First-Person "I've".)
They crawl through the night,
searching for a different bed.
Messy covers in the morning,
the sun has only just touched the sky.
They disappear in silence
not even as much as a goodbye.

(That's 'Enough' 'exposition', in my opinion, and time to get to the Chorus, the main idea of the Song.)

Now she met him as a boy. (Third-Person, Singer-Character talking about 'she' and 'him', narrating other peoples' experience.)
She was the girl next door.
Each Summer they'd move in,
just like every time before
But this one was different, (This summer was different)
the first time he caught her eye. ('he/her')
He seemed pretty quiet
and definitely shy. (It's taking a long time to set the scene. Is it time for the Chorus yet? Can you keep me listening?)

He was scared to admit it
and also a little scared of me, (Now your Singer-Character is in First-Person, 'me'. 'I'm' telling 'my' own story. Earlier it was Third-Person, 'she' and 'her'.)
that first night on the dock
they never guessed what would be. ('They', back to Third-Person).

One kiss had him buzzin'!
Oh! He couldn't get enough!
They never believed
that times could get tough.
Two children in love,
so many nights spent on that boat.
But Summers all die
and they couldn't stay afloat.

Chorus:
Boys Will Be Boys, (First 'hit' on THE Hook. How long does it take to get here?)
and there's no harm in that!
But girls soon grow up!
They have no time for that!
These boys will soon realize (Boys soon realize,)
how they've waited too long. (they've waited too long.)
cuz The good ones don't stick around, (Delete 'cuz'*)
They'll soon be long gone.
(Repeating your title here refreshes the listener's interest, emphasizing this as the main idea.)


Well now Summers do end,
but they always come again.
He's my ex. He's my neighbor, ('my' is First-Person. The Singer-Character is telling of her personal experience with the Love-Interest Character.)
but could never just be my friend. ('my' or 'her'?)
But something was different
this time around
His heart had gone missing!
It didn't wanna be found!
(Time for a Repeat of the Chorus.)

At least not by me, (More exposition. First-Person 'me'.)
but someone fresh and new. (Introduction of the 'Other-Woman' Character.)
See, when he brought her around
I didn't know what to do! ('I', First-Person)
Now this girl she was pretty,
I mean she lived at the gym.
She certainly stood out
and was crazy for him


He liked her puffed hair
and her fake bed tan
Maybe he even liked
how all the other girls ran
He thought she was bad,
in the best possible way
Boys Will Be Boys
is what I've always heard them say

Chorus repeats

Hook: (Maybe a 'Bridge'? But a Bridge is generally brief, perhaps with pivotal information, and its own Melody, variant from that of the Verse or Chorus, a 'device' to enable a final giving of the Chorus to end. Yours is more exposition, like a Verse.)
24-years-old now,
he wears a suite and tie
100 dollar haircut
to be a suave city guy
He lives for the weekends,
rips them back with the boys
"girlfriend?" he chuckles,
"I've had enough of that noise!"
Finger gun shot in hand,
he points it up to the lights
wakes up dazed and confused,
not sure where he spent the night
"Busy day" he explains
as he zips up his pants
then he closes her door,
doesn't even take a second glance
But Boys Will Be Boys!
That's what they all say!
So we laugh it all off,
chalk it up to them being this way

Now this boy that I knew, ('I', First-Person)
they'd all say he's grown up
but can this really be true,
if someone's incapable of love?
That beach he once knew,
well he hates it there now
You'd probably never see him,
not even know he's in town

But when he does roll through,
he's never with anyone new
He pulls out his phone says,
"I wanna rip some with you"
So she walks down her stairs
like so many times before
When he sees her he remembers
why he can never ignore
She sees right through him,
knows exactly who he is
which is why he's still scared,
just like a little kid

Chorus repeats

End Chorus:
So i will not stop you ('I', First-Person)
would never get in your way
I hope you find comfort
in the beds where you lay
but different beds start growing colder
and you'll only keep growing older
but Boys Will Be Boys
and some always stay that way

(Too long for a final giving of the Chorus? Maybe a short Coda of 2 or 3 repeats of THE Hook/title, and out.)
Sing through it and see how long it is, overall, how long to the Chorus and first 'hit' on THE Hook. Time is extremely important to terrestrial radio. Shorter leaves more time for commercial ads that pay the bills. The music is just there to keep you listening long enough to hear the ads.
The mode of 'consumption' of music in 2022 may mean there are media that could get this out to an audience. That audience may be drawn into a live performance. They may buy a download or a hard copy device of the Song, CD, USB drive. But first you have to interest them by getting it into their ears, and making them want to hear it again. Can a Song this long do it? Maybe. Only testing the market would tell.



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As long as you'll reach for your pen, paper, instruments, here will always be another Song to be written. Someone will write the next great Song. It could be you. http://www.garyeandrews.com
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 Posted: Tue Jan 18th, 2022 07:54 pm
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4th Post
The Big Gundown
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Joined: Wed May 6th, 2020
Location: Canada
Posts: 113
Favorite Artist: Nick Cave, Henry Mancini, The Cramps, John Zorn etc.
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I agree with Gary, it's waaaaaaay too long. If you are a singer sing this right through. Does it even keep your own interest? I have a longish story song which I love but I keep editing it down as much as I can. I'm still working on it over a year and a half later! For me, performing songs has been one of the most helpful things I've done. You have to be excited about singing it even if it's the 1000th time, it's the secret to a good song. If you're bored, then your audience will be equally bored. If you don't perform then forget writing songs like this for someone to sing. And who cares about radio airplay. Follow your passion but get songs streamlined and tight so definitely prune, get the choruses in sooner, and get a consistent point of view. Only seasoned performers get to mess with the formula. Keep paying your dues, nothing without effort friend :)

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