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Beyond Viagra
 Moderated by: Troy33, RainyDayMan, HankTheTank
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 Posted: Sat Jul 24th, 2021 02:42 am
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fasstrack
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Back in '08 I had an insanely funny day-long adventure waaay out East with (jazz vibist) the late Teddy Charles. The day started thusly: He said 'Hey, Fass: dial this # and ask for Julius Gubenko'. 'Wha?' 'DO IT, KID!'.

So he's on the phone with the man better known as (vibist) Terry Gibbs. The ensuing discussion was, er, on the blue side---like they were still 20-somethings hangin' in front of Birdland. I really had to bite my lip. But one line I can repeat from 81-year-old Teddy:
'I'm beyond Viagra. All I can do is dream'.

So slow-on-the-uptake me 13 years later finally realized what lyric gold that was. A lyric was born---imagined in the car, written down at work today:

Beyond Viagra Joel Fass © 2021 Exemplar (ASCAP)
(Verse: rubato) Some guys have all the luck
Living life with pluck, their dreams aloft;
While others seem to just get stuck,
Their luck turns hard ‘cause something else turned soft
So I’m be----

(Slow, light swing tempo)
-Yond Viagra, all I can do is dream
Aggravated ‘cause in the sack I can no more make ‘em scream
Cancel that trip to Niagra, babe, ‘cause far as I can tell
Those falls in Niagra ain’t the only thing that fell

(B) If you ask me ‘bout my sex life
It’s true I still got the gumption
Yes, the spirit’s plenty willing
But the flesh has got ‘erectile dysfunction’

A must to drag ya, I’m known as ‘Pleasure’s Death Knell'
And like the boy who fell deep into the well
Beyond Viagra’s sure to stay for a long, long spell
(Old erections never die, they just faaade away)

Last edited on Sat Jul 24th, 2021 05:01 am by fasstrack



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 Posted: Sat Jul 24th, 2021 11:48 pm
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RainyDayMan
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A tale of sadness and woe! ;)



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 Posted: Sun Jul 25th, 2021 12:07 am
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fasstrack
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RainyDayMan wrote:
A tale of sadness and woe! ;)...and limpness (limpidity? Is that a word? Now it is---LOL)...



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 Posted: Mon Jul 26th, 2021 02:24 am
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Motorist Sketchbook
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Wow. That's pretty funny.
I don't know much about Viagra. Never tried it.
Would it really not work when you are past the "age"? - lol

It seems to me that age would have nothing to do with it.
But what would I know?

Sketch



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 Posted: Thu Aug 26th, 2021 04:16 am
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fasstrack
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Motorist Sketchbook wrote:
Wow. That's pretty funny.
I don't know much about Viagra. Never tried it.
Would it really not work when you are past the "age"? - lol

It seems to me that age would have nothing to do with it.
But what would I know?

Sketch
Teddy was 81 then.

Me? 67, and not only not beyond it but HELL YEAH!...



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 Posted: Mon Oct 18th, 2021 12:16 am
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fasstrack
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I was reunited with my old Dr. recently, and out of curiosity asked about Viagra. Was told that it was originally created and marketed as a blood-pressure lowering drug. Mine is almost always perfect, needs no lowering. She then added 'If you get "blue vision" (whatever the hell THAT is) go right to the E.R.'.

Think I'll pass. Forever...



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 Posted: Tue Oct 19th, 2021 03:27 pm
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JAPOV
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I've always wondered what would happen if you took Viagra and ZyGain at the same time... Perhaps we should write a song about the 90yo man who mixed up his medication, and they had to lower the gurney to get him into the ER!:rollface



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Let's write something!!!! :)
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 Posted: Tue Oct 19th, 2021 11:06 pm
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fasstrack
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JAPOV wrote:
ZyGain... Sounds like the old Yiddish good luck wish Zy Gezunt (as Jewish etymology scholars one by one get apoplexy from my mangled spellings)...



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 Posted: Tue Oct 19th, 2021 11:09 pm
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fasstrack
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JAPOV wrote:
I've always wondered what would happen if you took Viagra and ZyGain at the same time... Perhaps we should write a song about the 90yo man who mixed up his medication, and they had to lower the gurney to get him into the ER!:rollface'If you get Priapism go right to the ER---but only after calling every name in your black book'---some wag...



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 Posted: Wed Dec 1st, 2021 03:01 pm
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CK
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Yep will lower blood pressure



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