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| Posted: Thu Aug 13th, 2020 07:12 pm |
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M.P. Dudash
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I go home and drink alone
Try’na wash my what if’s..away
The why’s’ll take a few shots
Our what could’ve beens a case
I’m drowning in a bottle
Same damn thing every night
With every sip I swallow
Another heavy dose of pride
Some questions don’t have answers
Sometimes truth contains a lie
So I ask myself these questions
What if, what could’ve been, and why
What if we were together
Imagine how’d it’d be
I pray that all our could’ve beens
Turn into memories
Why’s it taking so long
For me to get it right
I ask myself every single night.....
I’ll face darkness come morning
Even though the sun still shines
It’s hard erasing want
While thinking someday we might
Maybe we can make love
Beneath a starry sky
Until then, I’m stuck here in this fight
With the what if’s, what could’ve beens and why’s
What if we were together
Imagine how’d it’d be
I pray all our could’ve beens
Turn into memories
Why’s it taking so long
For me to get it right
I ask myself every single night.....
I appreciate everything about you
This reality keeps on killing me
I’ve wrestled these emotions for a lifetime
I just hope that they don’t haunt me till I leave
I wonder if she also fights with the....
What if’s, what could’ve been and why’s
Copyright © Michael P Dudash 8/13/20Last edited on Thu Aug 13th, 2020 11:00 pm by M.P. Dudash
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| Posted: Thu Aug 13th, 2020 10:08 pm |
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RainbowKeeper
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Ola,
Very good, especially the beginning! I can see you sitting there, drinking and battle demons. I love the „drown in a bottle“ line!
I think you missed an -s- at question don’t have answers and in the next line I’d put a the before truth...makes it sound stronger if you ask me.
When you get closer to the end the strong image from the beginning Fades a little. what’s written is good, but it loses a bit, you maybe have a closer look again.
RK
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| Posted: Thu Aug 13th, 2020 11:00 pm |
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M.P. Dudash
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Thanks Rainbow, IMO the first verse is one of the best I’ve written. I struggled with this due to the fact I even felt it was going to be very hard to maintain that throughout. Appreciate the look.
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| Posted: Sat Aug 15th, 2020 01:22 am |
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RainyDayMan
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I like it overall.
"What if, what could’ve been, and why" is a nice hook.
It may need a little smoothing when set to music, but best to wait for that. So for example I can imagine the first verse as:
I go home and drink alone
Try’na wash my what if’s..all away
The why’s’ll take a few more shots
Our could’ve beens... a whole damn case
-but only to the rhythm in my head!
My favorite part is:
Some questions don’t have answers
Sometimes truth contains a lie
So I ask myself these questions
What if, what could’ve been, and why
and I'd be tempted to use this as a pre-chorus
I don't like this line:
It’s hard erasing want
though the meaning fits. Maybe:
It’s hard erasing could've beens
While thinking someday we just might
I don't like the verse starting:
Maybe we can make love
I feel like the "what if" examples should be kept to the "What if were together" chorus(?) and the verses stick to the difficult realities.
If you did have the "Some questions don’t have answers" part in there as a pre-chorus you may not even need that extra verse.
Not sure about the "I appreciate everything about you" section. It feels out of kilter with the rest of the song.
But I like the coda. A different kind of wondering.
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| Posted: Sat Aug 15th, 2020 02:43 am |
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M.P. Dudash
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Appreciate the response Owen. I worked for 3 days on this one which is really rare for me. This one I think has potential so I will revisit. I really felt I could reach the depth of the opening verse and settled, that is my issue. Guess I’ll let it stew a while. Thanks
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| Posted: Sat Aug 15th, 2020 03:44 am |
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| Posted: Sat Aug 15th, 2020 04:18 am |
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jdtaper
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I love the lyrics and the hook. Once again, you do all of the Classic Country legends proud! 
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| Posted: Sat Aug 15th, 2020 04:44 pm |
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Andrea
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Great hook line to build a song around.
I love this part the best. I would like to see this repeat. It fits in well with all the verses.
"Some questions don’t have answers
Sometimes truth contains a lie
So I ask myself these questions
What if, what could’ve been, and why"
I agree with RDM and like his suggestion here:
"I don't like this line:
It’s hard erasing want
though the meaning fits. Maybe:
It’s hard erasing could've beens
While thinking someday we just might"
"Maybe we can make love, Beneath a starry sky" feels different than the rest. I would ty to rewrite these 2 lines.
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| Posted: Sun Aug 16th, 2020 03:02 pm |
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M.P. Dudash
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Thanks JD. Andrea, yes I see some need for improvement.
Thanks for pointing out the issues as well. Back to the table with this one.
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