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cmaja
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Joined: Fri Mar 22nd, 2019
Location: Kennewick, Washington USA
Posts: 1072
Favorite Artist: Eagles, Linda Ronstadt, Keith Urban, Billie Holiday, Metallica, Steely Dan
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The More I Give In The More You Go Out

Verse 1:
That lonely moon’s telling me we’re nearly through
I hear a canine’s call like he’s lost and blue
Even as I’m all alone with my broken heart
Don’t matter what I do, we fade apart

Chorus 1:
I try everything to please you
I buy you things you can’t do without
I change my ways to appease you
Am I being overly devout
Should I save my heart and just free you
Since the more I give in, the more you go out

Verse 2:
Alone again I won’t see you till morning light
You left in a huff when I refused to fight
I look for headlights, thinking it may be your car
Do you still have love for me in your heart

Pre-chorus:
I never thought our love would end like this
What did I miss...

Chorus 2:
I tried everything just to please you
I bought you things you can’t do without
I changed my ways to appease you
Was I being overly devout
Guess I’ll save my heart and just free you
Since the more I give in, the more you go out

Bridge:
Do you have a special friend you’ve been seeing
Did he tell you all the things you long to hear
Did you open up your heart so he can see in
Or’s he just another souvenir

Chorus 3:
Will you try everything to please him
And buy him things he can’t do without
And change your ways to appease him
Maybe you’ll be overly devout
Will you change your heart and just leave him
When the more you give in, the more he goes out

(Instrumental break)

Chorus 2:
I tried everything just to please you
I bought you things you can’t do without
I changed my ways to appease you
Was I being overly devout
Guess I’ll save my heart and just free you
Since the more I give in, the more you go out

Post chorus:
The more I give in, the more... you go out

© 2020 Charles M Anderson

MASempine
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Joined: Fri Jul 10th, 2020
Location: Bridgeport, Alabama USA
Posts: 239
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I like the hook a lot

Would like to see more of her going out included. Good portrait of the giving in guy

cmaja
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Joined: Fri Mar 22nd, 2019
Location: Kennewick, Washington USA
Posts: 1072
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Hey, MAS... Thanks for your review and positive comments. If I wrote it in the third person, I could go into her goings out. But being in the first person, I can only show his perspective. He doesn’t know and she ain’t saying. Of course his heart knows, but the language of the heart is an enigma only decipherable in the words between the lines and the silence between the notes.

Charles

M.P. Dudash
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Joined: Mon Apr 24th, 2017
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Charles, I like it. My favorite part being the chorus. Only one really small thing is I think instead of or’s make it or is. I think the additional syllable helps.

cmaja
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Hey Mike, thanks for your review. I’m pleased you like it. “Or’s” or “or is” is mostly the singer’s decision. I’m flexible.

Charles

Andrea
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I too like the chorus the best. I like the storyline. I must say though, MAS, this guy is well past a giving guy - he is a sorry fool. Cool write.

cmaja
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Joined: Fri Mar 22nd, 2019
Location: Kennewick, Washington USA
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Andrea wrote:
I too like the chorus the best. I like the storyline. I must say though, MAS, this guy is well past a giving guy - he is a sorry fool. Cool write.

Yea, Andrea, love is the fool. Better to be a fool in love than a loveless smarty. I appreciate your positive review. Sincerely,

Charles

jdtaper
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Joined: Sun Dec 25th, 2016
Location: Milwaukee, USA
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This sounds like a perfect mix of Late 70s-Early 80's soft rock and Country-Pop (Urban Cowboy). Well done! :)

cmaja
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Joined: Fri Mar 22nd, 2019
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jdtaper wrote:
This sounds like a perfect mix of Late 70s-Early 80's soft rock and Country-Pop (Urban Cowboy). Well done! :)

Thanks, JD for your review. Glad you like it! I try to make my lyrics immediately singable and good lyrics from that period are the types I pick up on. Cheers,

Charles


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