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Man She Looks Good in that Sweater
 Moderated by: Troy33, RainyDayMan, HankTheTank
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 Posted: Fri Jul 31st, 2020 03:58 am
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MASempine
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Joined: Fri Jul 10th, 2020
Location: Bridgeport, Alabama USA
Posts: 143
Favorite Artist: Mac Davis, Ray Stevens,
I am a: Songwriter
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I was looking at the Music Database and checked out a song that MopTop had written the music for. I wanted to see if I could write lyrics for a melody I liked so I picked his and wrote these lyrics tonight.

Man She Looks Good in that Sweater

Well she does look pretty
And I’m all alone
If she came and sat down beside me
I’d see in the mirror the man she’s known
And I’d know that man was a cheater

She knew it the night we first met

Why does she look so much better
Than she looked when I left her at home
I admit that the light is much dimmer
But those eyes picked me out as they roamed
I fear that another might get her
Cause man she looks good in that sweater

I’m thinking about our quarrel
Sure she was egging me on
I was fooled I should have known better
No way she should be smiling
When she dared me to leave her alone
And I should have noticed that sweater

She wore it the night we first met

Why does she look so much better
Than she looked when I left her at home
I admit that the light is much dimmer
But those eyes picked me out as they roamed
I fear that another might get her
Cause man she looks good in that sweater

She’s waiting I hope
For me to approach
There’s no way that she could decline
She’s flirting with Eddie
My hands are all sweaty
Now I’m standing up
Man, she looks fine

Why does she look so much better
Than she looked when I left her at home
I admit that the light is much dimmer
But those eyes picked me out as they roamed
There’s no way another might get her
Cause man she looks good in that sweater

Last edited on Sat Aug 1st, 2020 02:53 am by MASempine



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 Posted: Sat Aug 1st, 2020 09:06 am
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cmaja
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Joined: Fri Mar 22nd, 2019
Location: Kennewick, Washington USA
Posts: 911
Favorite Artist: Eagles, Linda Ronstadt, Keith Urban, Billie Holiday, Metallica, Steely Dan
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Hi, MAS... Good job! Came out absolutely charming! One small suggestion. The line: She knew it the night we first met, try: She knew, that night I first met her. You get a little better rhyming sequence, no?

Charles



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 Posted: Sat Aug 1st, 2020 03:06 pm
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3rd Post
MASempine
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Joined: Fri Jul 10th, 2020
Location: Bridgeport, Alabama USA
Posts: 143
Favorite Artist: Mac Davis, Ray Stevens,
I am a: Songwriter
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I like the suggestion but I am trying to replicate the meter of an existing song. If I give this lyric a life of its own I will use it



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