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Angels
 Moderated by: Troy33, RainyDayMan, HankTheTank
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 Posted: Wed Jul 22nd, 2020 01:11 am
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RainbowKeeper
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Bonjour y‘all!
This one is a bit difficult for me, cause I wanted to keep the parts of the story as close as possible to how they really have happened. So I’m a bit unsure about the a- parts and the coda. I really like the b- and c-part, so I decided to finish it. And it was a hard birth, I tell you. But anyway I’ll poste it, hoping for some comments and feedback. Like I said it was hard work, but if you really like some parts and are unsure about others....you need other opinions.
Thanx!
RK

Angels do exist

I wore my new coat, been so proud A‘
But some strange guys just laughed out loud
Why they did it? I still don’t know
I felt hurt and my mood turned low
I rushed to work, wearing my coat
A stranger stopped me on my road
He loved my coat, he smiled at me
And shaked my hand and set me free

In a deep dark time in my life. A+
Not knowing how I could survive
This old man who I hardly knew
Guided me and helped me through
And while I’ve been completely down
Not able to go into town
He came and listend to my pain
And helped me to deal with my strain

Angels do exist. B
Listen to the whispering voice
Angels do exist
Be sure that they are all around
Angels do exist
Listen to the whispering voice
Have faith, have hope, believe in wonders
And your soul may soon rejoice

Then when you’re not prepared C
They will embrace your soul
Then when you’re not prepared
They will reach your heart
Tellin‘ you That God‘s love will never fade
So don’t be afraid

No need of loud sound and bright light. Coda
Silently they stay by your side
Sometimes they just give you a smile
They will walk with you, mile by mile


© by Ian P.
21.07.2020/3:02 am
W by Ian P.
for: VB



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Interested in convos about good music and specially about songwriting, lyrics and ideas. All my stuff is protected! copyright by FabIan Peters

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 Posted: Mon Jul 27th, 2020 03:43 pm
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Andrea
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Hi RK, I am having trouble connecting the verses together. It feels like there are different ideas in each verse, but I can not completely find the flow from one to the other. V1 started a story, but v2 seemed to go somewhere new. He was set free, but then he was in a dark time. I thought A+ was talking about a therapist. B and C are religious, and I can perhaps see lines from the As that could point that way, but are not completely. I would find the line of the story that connects and make sure it follows through the verses. I like the Angels idea.



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 Posted: Mon Jul 27th, 2020 09:00 pm
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RainbowKeeper
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Bonjour Andrea,

Yeah it was kinda tricky for me to write, but I’m talking about 3 different ppl there. That’s why I added the plural -s and talk about angels...not just one 😉 but I understand that it’s not easy for an outsider to understand or better ...follow the whole thing. Well it was an idea of mine that came a long way and you know me that well that if it „overcomes“ me I have to write it and give it a shot!
So yeah, these are 3 different scenarios that I have tried to write about.
1. coat 2. the old man (who literally saved my life) and 3. is a man I was introduced to while I’ve been in hospital. And well I guess it’s even more confusing the reader because these are all male ppl. Maybe I change one into a she...I dunno yet.
But if you have any ideas to bring more flow to it....my ears and eyes are wide open.... 😅😉
Ty for your feedback!

Rk



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Hey y’all !
Im new here and tryin to figure out how this forum works!
Interested in convos about good music and specially about songwriting, lyrics and ideas. All my stuff is protected! copyright by FabIan Peters

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 Posted: Tue Jul 28th, 2020 12:50 am
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Andrea
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Ok Rk- the background helps. First I would suggest having the chorus come between the verses. I think that would help. I will have to think on the rest more.



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 Posted: Tue Jul 28th, 2020 01:26 am
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RainbowKeeper
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Heya,

Yep like usual is the structure not written in stone yet. It will find its way if.... I find music for this.
But ty for your thought and input, can’t wait to read your ideas!

Ian



____________________
Hey y’all !
Im new here and tryin to figure out how this forum works!
Interested in convos about good music and specially about songwriting, lyrics and ideas. All my stuff is protected! copyright by FabIan Peters

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