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A Heart Knows
 Moderated by: Troy33, RainyDayMan, HankTheTank
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 Posted: Mon Jul 13th, 2020 06:03 pm
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M.P. Dudash
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I’ve asked myself this question
Now for thirty years
If the writings on the wall
Why isn’t it more clear

How’s a man supposed to go on
Always asking why
What’s meant to be always seems
To somehow pass him by

Cause a heart knows
Where it’s soul
Was always meant to be
And this heart knows
Just where it’s
Supposed to be

Every breath we breathe apart
Is one less that we’ll share
Every feeling that goes unsaid
Leads to pain and despair

We keep playing hide and seek
From the fantasy
That’s bound our souls from the very start
This wanting you is easy it’s the distance
That’s tearing me apart

Cause a heart knows
Where it’s soul
Was always meant to be
And this heart knows
Just where it’s
Supposed to be

Yes this heart knows just where it’s
Supposed to be

Copyright © Michael P Dudash 7/14/2020



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 Posted: Wed Jul 15th, 2020 02:30 am
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MASempine
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I don't like the second half of the chorus. You had it going so good then those three lines were a let down

Need something better than "Leads to pain and despair" Again first three lines in this verse are very good. Then a letdown. You settled.

I don't think the "hide and seek" verse is nearly as good ast the rest and I don't really think it fits. At least from what I was thinking

You've got something really good going. Just need to "top it off"



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 Posted: Wed Jul 15th, 2020 03:21 am
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M.P. Dudash
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Thanks for looking and commenting MA. I’ll see if I can straighten some things out. I don’t usually revisit but I like this one so I probably will. My biggest dislike was the double be in the chorus big couldn’t seem to find a work around. Thanks



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 Posted: Wed Jul 15th, 2020 06:23 am
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RainyDayMan
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I like the flow and feel of this, seems like its nearly there.

From those first verses, I read it as a relationship that broke down 30 years ago. If that's so, it seems a forlorn hope that they are getting back together, regardless of distance.

I get the feeling you havent quite decided whether they are getting back together or not. Might help the song click if you went one way or the other. Set everything in the past tense and it becomes how do I go forward when my heart still points to you? Or lose the 30 years thing and make it current where they still have a chance if she will acknowledge they are meant for each other.

The 2nd half of the chorus seems to repeat the first 3 lines. I'd try for something that explicitly says where the heart is meant to be, like a lodestone pointing to you, or something like that.



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 Posted: Wed Jul 15th, 2020 11:38 am
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MASempine
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Thanks for appreciating. I really only want you to be the best you can be (and for you) that is really really good. You have talent and a "country song writing knack" that some of the great ones had/have.

I hope you do revisit this one. Isn't it odd that when you look back at a poem or lyrics that you wrote years ago, it either seems better than you thought OR you see an easy way to make it better.



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 Posted: Wed Jul 15th, 2020 12:08 pm
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M.P. Dudash
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Thanks Owen, appreciate the comments. I like some of those ideas. I’ll have to take another look at this one.
MAS, thanks for the kind words. I often look back and think boy my writing has evolved. Problem now is I get stuck sometimes trying to write too deep I think. Trying to write something so different that it falls apart.



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 Posted: Sat Jul 18th, 2020 05:31 pm
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cmaja
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This is quite good, Mike... It has an underlying truth to it that is hard for most to see. That is, the eternal bond that links us one another and the Infinite. Very good. I really like it!

Charles



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 Posted: Wed Aug 12th, 2020 04:03 pm
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jdtaper
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I love that your songs have a Classic Country influence but this one also has a current Contemporary Country melody. Keep up the good work! 👍



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