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To Be Determined
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 Posted: Sat Jun 20th, 2020 05:36 pm
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cmaja
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I started to write the chorus first, but it sounded like a verse and then a bridge. So I used the first four lines for the bridge and the last two to form a verse. Wrote two verses but still had no chorus. Let it sit for a few days but no luck. Then the next day I look at my non-title title: TBD. And it hit me: To Be Determined! And that turn it around giving it a snappy, positive spin. CMA

To Be Determined

Verse 1:
Feeling that your faith is gone, you got no where to turn
Thinking that your hopes are dashed, your plans are all stillborn
Those means and schemes, those pipe dreams are lost within a storm
Tell yourself you need help, it’s all spinning and you heart is torn

Pre-chorus:
But night bows to morning light
So shed the darkness from your head

Chorus:
Your life’s to be determined
There’s sunny days ahead
If you keep a-yearnin’
Put on a smile instead
Keep your hopes a-burnin’
Don’t you face this world alone
Not too much is set in stone
It’s all... to be determined

Verse 2:
Mornings you awoke in tears from nights that ended wrong
Wishing your game could change so you felt that you belonged
Those scams and dreams always seem to end up on the floor
Tell yourself can’t go on like this, you won’t take it anymore

Pre-chorus:
But night bows to morning light
So shed the darkness from your head

Chorus:
Your life’s to be determined
There’s sunny days ahead
If you keep a-yearnin’
Put on a smile instead
Keep your hopes a-burnin’
Don’t you face this world alone
Not too much is set in stone
It’s all... to be determined

Bridge:
How many times have you asked to be forgiven
How many times have you said, Lord come take my hand
When you felt your losin’ far surpassed your winnin’
When you fell to your knees, cried God, help me understand

Chorus:
Your life’s to be determined
There’s sunny days ahead
If you keep a-yearnin’
Put on a smile instead
Keep your hopes a-burnin’
Don’t you face this world alone
Not too much is set in stone
It’s all... to be determined

Post Chorus:
It’s all to be determined

© 2020 Charles M Anderson



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 Posted: Sun Jun 21st, 2020 04:42 pm
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JAPOV
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I like the sentiment here.

I wonder if "To be continued" would work better though? Many people actually believe that Armageddon is a cataclysmic "end of the world" event but that's not true. Armageddon is man's final world war that God has to put an end to before we destroy ourselves. Point being, there is no end of the world. Ultimately, the world is made new again...



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 Posted: Sun Jun 21st, 2020 09:54 pm
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cmaja
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JAPOV wrote:
I like the sentiment here.

I wonder if "To be continued" would work better though? Many people actually believe that Armageddon is a cataclysmic "end of the world" event but that's not true. Armageddon is man's final world war that God has to put an end to before we destroy ourselves. Point being, there is no end of the world. Ultimately, the world is made new again...


Hey, JAPOV... I wrote this from a micro rather than a macro perspective. The chorus says, ‘not much is set in stone.’ Suggesting that there are events, yet to come, that are ‘set in stone.’ But the micro reflects the macro, as the chorus points to renewal. Thanks for your review.

Charles



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 Posted: Fri Jul 10th, 2020 08:40 pm
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MASempine
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I am new and don't know anyone's style or perspective or anything much about you folks.

I really like the chorus. "Determined" acknowledges that God is in control although it could NOT MEAN THAT to the writer. I wouldn't be comfortable with the rest of the song. Even if it's meant to get you back to that really good chorus, I think it can be improved. My method of improving my lyrics is to go on a car trip and sing them over and over about 100 times. Of course I've missed a few turn-offs but the time flew by.

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 Posted: Fri Jul 10th, 2020 09:21 pm
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cmaja
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MASempine wrote:
I am new and don't know anyone's style or perspective or anything much about you folks.

I really like the chorus. "Determined" acknowledges that God is in control although it could NOT MEAN THAT to the writer. I wouldn't be comfortable with the rest of the song. Even if it's meant to get you back to that really good chorus, I think it can be improved. My method of improving my lyrics is to go on a car trip and sing them over and over about 100 times. Of course I've missed a few turn-offs but the time flew by.


Hey, thanks for your review, MAS... Have you ever had “hard days?” He who is the All-seeing, the Omniscient, the Omnipotent surely He is in control, although few see it. I don’t mind if you take this lyric on a road trip and sing it out. You could get back with me for some collaborative ideas. Since much of my life has been in toil, I tend to write about it as such. Thanks, again. Peace,


Charles



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 Posted: Sun Jul 12th, 2020 03:27 am
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MASempine
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I’ve just terminated a collaborative effort. It may be a while before I’m ready to spend hours of my time only to have my “work output” dismissed because the music guy said he couldn’t sing it that way. It was frustrating because I thought WE were getting close to something very good indeed.

Looks like you have quite a number of works posted. I’m to the point that I’d be happy having just one of my top 10 lyrics put to music and sung by a good vocalist. I’m working to make that happen but haven’t connected with the right folks yet

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 Posted: Sun Jul 12th, 2020 07:10 am
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cmaja
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MASempine wrote:
I’ve just terminated a collaborative effort. It may be a while before I’m ready to spend hours of my time only to have my “work output” dismissed because the music guy said he couldn’t sing it that way. It was frustrating because I thought WE were getting close to something very good indeed.

Looks like you have quite a number of works posted. I’m to the point that I’d be happy having just one of my top 10 lyrics put to music and sung by a good vocalist. I’m working to make that happen but haven’t connected with the right folks yet


I don’t let the music guys get me down. Many are not very reliable. Especially the amateurs. I have one professional producer/composer I’m working with but things are moving kinda slow. Still working on the first song. But God has been patient with me, so...

Yea, I’ve posted over 150 lyrics and songs. I write prolifically. I’m kinda obsessed, but I love it! I have about 70-80 I’ve never posted. I’d have a tough time picking out my top ten. I need a dedicated Elton John, desperately.

Charles



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 Posted: Sun Jul 12th, 2020 05:05 pm
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MASempine
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Odd thing about older non posted lyrics. Sometimes you read them now and you can feel a song there where it only seemed to be a poem before. I have one HES THE GOD OF TOMORROW AS WELL AS TODAY that all 3 of my grown daughters love. Two have framed versions of just the title. The other daughter actually composed a melody that is now lost.

What I’m trying to say is that recently I realized a popular tune must have been in my head when I first wrote the words. Now I just need a singer!

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 Posted: Mon Jul 13th, 2020 05:18 am
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cmaja
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Yea, I hear ya MAS... Some of my oldest lyrics are quite good although. I have found that sometimes lyrics I think are good I get no comments and little interest, and others I think are kinda mediocre people love. It’s so subjective. I wrote, Caught In Catch-22, which was a fun lyric, easy to write and succinct, but, I felt kinda average, it’s my most popular of all posted. Go figure...

Charles



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