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Wish Me No Roses
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 Posted: Sun May 3rd, 2020 08:40 pm
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cmaja
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Wish Me No Roses

Verse 1:
Freshly fallen petals for the love that I once knew
Redden the alcove and the table near the door
From sympathetic roses, saying our love’s through
I sweep ‘em in a dustpan, they clash the decor
Though I’m broken hearted, I am also blue
So wish me no roses, I can’t take anymore

Chorus:
Wish me good health, good fortune and Godspeed
Pray that He’ll give me everything I need
Wish me the moon and stars, sunshine and blue skies
And hopes that my dreams will be realized
Wish me the strength, I need, when my life gets rough
But wish me no roses, for I’ve cried enough

(short musical break)

Verse 2:
Twelve bouquets of roses stand behind a wooden case
Twenty years of love shared, forever my best friend
I packed up all her stuff, now I have all this space
But I can’t deal with roses or their thorny stems
Though my friend’s departed, everywhere’s her face
So wish me no roses, because my heart won’t mend

Chorus:
Wish me good health, good fortune and Godspeed
Pray that He’ll give me everything I need
Wish me the moon and stars, sunshine and blue skies
And hopes that my dreams will be realized
Wish me the strength, I need, when my life gets rough
But wish me no roses, for I’ve cried enough

(short musical break)

Bridge:
Roses for students who’ve finally graduated
Roses for friends whose birthdays are belated
Roses for the lovers who have finally dated
Why roses for tragedies unanticipated

(musical break)

Chorus:
Wish me good health, good fortune and Godspeed
Pray that He’ll give me everything I need
Wish me the moon and stars, sunshine and blue skies
And hopes that my dreams will be realized
Wish me the strength, I need, when my life gets rough
But wish me no roses, for I've cried enough

Post Chorus:
Please wish me no roses... I have cried enough

© 2020 Charles M Anderson

Last edited on Mon Jul 13th, 2020 07:27 pm by cmaja



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 Posted: Tue May 5th, 2020 06:47 am
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RainyDayMan
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I like it Charles. I like the longer flowing style of the lines.

"Wish me no roses" is a strong title, and it's a nice twist to think of them as symbols of sadness rather than happiness.

I'm interpreting verses 1 & 2 as separate incidents in life rather than being the same event, and the bridge reinforces that with a list of other events.

Very nice.



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 Posted: Tue May 5th, 2020 04:35 pm
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cmaja
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Thanks, RD Man... I appreciate your review and comments. Verse 1, refers to an ex-girlfriend and 2, to a friend. Actually verse 2, has to do with a gal, I worked with (instead of lived with), who died due to cancer. But I wrote it so it could be sung by either gender.

Charles



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 Posted: Mon Jul 13th, 2020 12:41 am
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MASempine
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There are so many great sections. I like the bridge the best. My problem is that about a third of the song is “okay”. The rest is too good to hang with the okay part.

I know I’m not helping much. Example might help right?

Lines 2, 3 and 4 are just okay. Slightly forced. Man I know how hard it is for every line to be profound but so much of this song is perfect.



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 Posted: Mon Jul 13th, 2020 05:38 am
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cmaja
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Yea, MAS, examples help. What really matter is what the composer, singer and producer like or don’t. I sing this out and it sound just right to me. But how much do I matter. Maybe a little... Thanks for your review and comments. Sincerely,

Charles



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 Posted: Mon Jul 13th, 2020 05:56 pm
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M.P. Dudash
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Charles, cool title. I like it. My favorite being the chorus. Really the only suggestion I can offer is the final line of the chorus changing from I have cried enough to For I’ve cried enough. For me it sings easier but it’s not uncommon for me to not pick up on how someone else intends it to sound. Take it or leave it.



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 Posted: Mon Jul 13th, 2020 07:33 pm
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cmaja
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Hi, Mike, thanks for your review and suggestion. I changed it base on you input. Sings better. But I left the post chorus as is since there is a longer pause before it. Cheers,


Charles



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