 |
| Posted: Mon Apr 6th, 2020 12:03 am |
|
1st Post |
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
I wrote this with Bunny's challenge in mind. With Easter approaching, I wanted to write something about having faith. It isn't exactly what I wanted for Easter (I will try again), but it is what came out.
He Is The Light And The Way
Sometimes the dark storms, won't dissipate
Every hill is a mountain
Every stream is a lake
You want to surrender
Your struggles too great
He is the light and the way
He is the light and the way
His love is your stronghold
So don't be afraid
Follow in Jesus
Sing alleluia, sing praise
He is the light and the way
See how the lighting, shines like your guide
Every step makes you stronger
Until you find your stride
If your footsteps feel heavy
He'll be at your side
He is the light and the way
He is the light and the way
His love is your stronghold
So don't be afraid
Follow in Jesus
Sing alleluia, sing praise
He is the light and the way
He is the light and the way
Sing alleluia, sing praise
He is the light and the way
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Mon Apr 6th, 2020 02:04 am |
|
2nd Post |
RainbowKeeper
Contributor
| Joined: | Fri Feb 14th, 2020 |
| Location: | Germany |
| Posts: | 524 |
| Favorite Artist: | | | I am a: | Singer/Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Bonjour, your Text reminded me of a very strong and great poem. Dunno if you know it?!
Footprints in the sand
One night I dreamed a dream.
As I was walking along the beach with my Lord.
Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand,
One belonging to me and one to my Lord.
After the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that at many times along the path of my life,
especially at the very lowest and saddest times,
there was only one set of footprints.
This really troubled me, so I asked the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said once I decided to follow you,
You'd walk with me all the way.
But I noticed that during the saddest and most troublesome times of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why, when I needed You the most, You would leave me."
He whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you
Never, ever, during your trials and testings.
When you saw only one set of footprints,
It was then that I carried you."
I like your lyrics a lot. They seem to show us something personal of you....
The only thing I personally would change a little is
„Sing alleluia, sing praise„... somehow it seems a little to short to me, so that I would change the , into an „and“...or would change it to: sing and praise... just a Suggestion but I think it would give this line a little more „air to breath“....
You write great stuff....I told you before hu? 😉
Keep on using your great gift!
Yours
RK
____________________
Hey y’all !
Im new here and tryin to figure out how this forum works!
Interested in convos about good music and specially about songwriting, lyrics and ideas. All my stuff is protected! copyright by FabIan Peters
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Tue Apr 7th, 2020 12:05 am |
|
3rd Post |
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Hi RK, Thank you so much for your continued support and kind words. Yes, I am familiar with 'Footprints In The Sand'. It gives me chills. If my lyrics remind you of this poem, I am very pleased- to say the least.
As for "Sing alleluia, sing praise", I kind of hear it in my head this way, so for now I will keep it as is. If the time comes, and a change fit, I will keep your idea in mind. Thank you.
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Tue Apr 7th, 2020 09:36 am |
|
4th Post |
RainbowKeeper
Contributor
| Joined: | Fri Feb 14th, 2020 |
| Location: | Germany |
| Posts: | 524 |
| Favorite Artist: | | | I am a: | Singer/Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Hey there,
Yep it was a big reminder of that poem! I tell you! Now I have a new idea in my head too! Lol
Enjoy your beautiful work
RK
____________________
Hey y’all !
Im new here and tryin to figure out how this forum works!
Interested in convos about good music and specially about songwriting, lyrics and ideas. All my stuff is protected! copyright by FabIan Peters
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Thu Apr 9th, 2020 12:54 am |
|
5th Post |
JAPOV
Member
| Joined: | Mon Jul 17th, 2017 |
| Location: | Alabama USA |
| Posts: | 702 |
| Favorite Artist: | | | I am a: | Singer/Songwriter/Musician |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
This'll be easier if I just show you lol... Keep or sweep 
Sometimes darkness suffocates
Every hill is a mountain
Every stream rages
The struggle is too great
And I want to surrender
Then, He lights my way
He lights my way
Like a father's embrace
All fear gives way
To these words I pray
Sing alleluia, sing praise
Then, He lights my way
Even the lightning
Obeys His command
He lends me His strength
So I can stand
Then, He lights my way
He lights my way
As I walk through the valley
I shall not fear
Then, He lights my way
He lights my way
He is the light and the way
Sing alleluia, sing praise
He lights my way
He lights my way
____________________
http://www.soundclick.com/JAPOV
Let's write something!!!!
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Thu Apr 9th, 2020 01:52 am |
|
6th Post |
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
JAPOV, What you wrote is very beautiful. I think it seems like almost completely different lyrics. It would be helpful to me if you told me what you didn't like of mine. This is not a genre know much about, so I am most willing to learn. Thanks
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Thu Apr 9th, 2020 02:34 am |
|
7th Post |
JAPOV
Member
| Joined: | Mon Jul 17th, 2017 |
| Location: | Alabama USA |
| Posts: | 702 |
| Favorite Artist: | | | I am a: | Singer/Songwriter/Musician |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Well... lol, it really wasn't a matter of "dislike". I just agreed with everyone else... too much like "Footprints". So, the first and easiest thing I did was remove "you" and insert "I" to give it a more testimonial feel. Then, line by line, I just tried to emphasize "light and the way". From my perspective this is still very much your concept, it just needed some tweaking
____________________
http://www.soundclick.com/JAPOV
Let's write something!!!!
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Thu Apr 9th, 2020 03:11 am |
|
8th Post |
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Hmm... ok. I didn't write this with "Footprints" in my mind. These are my authentic ideas, and I do not personally think it is that similar. I will think about the feedback and then think about some changes. Thanks for your comments and suggestions.
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Thu Apr 9th, 2020 03:44 pm |
|
9th Post |
RainbowKeeper
Contributor
| Joined: | Fri Feb 14th, 2020 |
| Location: | Germany |
| Posts: | 524 |
| Favorite Artist: | | | I am a: | Singer/Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Hey there,
I don’t think the lyrics are „to much like“ footprints. But they remind me of it. I do like how it’s written, and all I would change is what
I said above. Guess it will be easier to put it together with music then. But if you don’t want that it’s ok.
Cheerio
RK
____________________
Hey y’all !
Im new here and tryin to figure out how this forum works!
Interested in convos about good music and specially about songwriting, lyrics and ideas. All my stuff is protected! copyright by FabIan Peters
|
|
Back To Top
|
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
RainbowKeeper wrote:
Hey there,
I don’t think the lyrics are „to much like“ footprints. But they remind me of it. I do like how it’s written, and all I would change is what
I said above. Guess it will be easier to put it together with music then. But if you don’t want that it’s ok.
Cheerio
RK
Thanks RK. I agree making some subtle changes will be easier when it comes time to put music to it. If you have something in mind, I would live to hear. Enjoy
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 10th, 2020 05:01 pm |
|
11th Post |
| Posted: Fri Apr 10th, 2020 09:03 pm |
|
12th Post |
RainbowKeeper
Contributor
| Joined: | Fri Feb 14th, 2020 |
| Location: | Germany |
| Posts: | 524 |
| Favorite Artist: | | | I am a: | Singer/Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
I’d be glad if I’m able to help you there Andrea.
Just give me a little time.
Yours RK
____________________
Hey y’all !
Im new here and tryin to figure out how this forum works!
Interested in convos about good music and specially about songwriting, lyrics and ideas. All my stuff is protected! copyright by FabIan Peters
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 10th, 2020 09:16 pm |
|
13th Post |
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
JAPOV wrote:
You don't do music Andrea?
I am sorry to say, I do not write music. I am trying to learn guitar, but I am far from putting the pieces that I know together to make a song.Last edited on Fri Apr 10th, 2020 09:17 pm by Andrea
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Fri Apr 10th, 2020 09:19 pm |
|
14th Post |
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
RainbowKeeper wrote:
I’d be glad if I’m able to help you there Andrea.
Just give me a little time.
Yours RK
Thank RK. I am always willing to accept musical help for all my lyrics! Whenever you find time
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Mon Jul 13th, 2020 09:41 pm |
|
15th Post |
MASempine
Member
| Joined: | Fri Jul 10th, 2020 |
| Location: | Bridgeport, Alabama USA |
| Posts: | 238 |
| Favorite Artist: | Mac Davis, Ray Stevens, | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
I’ve tried but I can’t make the light and the way couplet connect to the rest of the song. Lightning almost makes a connection but I’ve ne never thought of Jesus as that kind of light
____________________
What God cannot do is an empty list {...}
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Mon Jul 13th, 2020 10:47 pm |
|
16th Post |
RainbowKeeper
Contributor
| Joined: | Fri Feb 14th, 2020 |
| Location: | Germany |
| Posts: | 524 |
| Favorite Artist: | | | I am a: | Singer/Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Not even if you look up joh. 8,12 ?
____________________
Hey y’all !
Im new here and tryin to figure out how this forum works!
Interested in convos about good music and specially about songwriting, lyrics and ideas. All my stuff is protected! copyright by FabIan Peters
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Tue Jul 14th, 2020 03:11 pm |
|
17th Post |
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Thanks MASempine for reading. I hope RK's comment helps here (John 8.12). Also I love John 14.
The lightning here is meant to suggest that even when things seem troubled and turbulent, Jesus's light is still there. Peace
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Tue Jul 14th, 2020 05:58 pm |
|
18th Post |
MASempine
Member
| Joined: | Fri Jul 10th, 2020 |
| Location: | Bridgeport, Alabama USA |
| Posts: | 238 |
| Favorite Artist: | Mac Davis, Ray Stevens, | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Oh I know he’s the light and the way but he’s so much more every single day. If you mean what I think you mean by stronghold— he’s a protector. He’s also a comforter and a friend. Those qualities seem to be the ones you are describing. Of course the light and the way are assuredly the most important ones for trip home and for figuring out what he wants us to do
____________________
What God cannot do is an empty list {...}
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Tue Jul 14th, 2020 06:10 pm |
|
19th Post |
Andrea
Moderator
| Joined: | Tue Nov 27th, 2018 |
| Location: | Poughkeepsie, New York USA |
| Posts: | 1997 |
| Favorite Artist: | Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
Yes, He is everything good. We will need many songs to tell it all. Peace
____________________
Andrea
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Posted: Wed Jul 15th, 2020 12:51 pm |
|
20th Post |
MASempine
Member
| Joined: | Fri Jul 10th, 2020 |
| Location: | Bridgeport, Alabama USA |
| Posts: | 238 |
| Favorite Artist: | Mac Davis, Ray Stevens, | | I am a: | Songwriter |
| Status: |
Offline
|
|
I think I didn't do a very good job telling what I wanted to tell.
You hit it on the head with your last post. "We will need many songs to tell it all. Peace."
I think you've got two different songs going and neither one is going to tell what needs to be told. You need two different songs: One for light and way. The other for the Psalms 23-like stuff. If I were you I'd re-read JAPOV's suggested lyrics and try to figure out what he's trying to say.
Me-I don't think I'm coming across the way I need to so I'm "out" as they say on Shark Tank
____________________
What God cannot do is an empty list {...}
|
|
Back To Top
|
| Current time is 04:25 am | Page: 1 2   |
|
|
|
