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Motorist Sketchbook
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Okay. Here's a FINAL FINAL (meaningless term - lol) draft. First and second drafts below.
Any more suggestions for changes accepted now.Plan is to record vocals Saturday 04/04/2020.

Biggest changes made here were to the first verse, the beginning of each verse AND
mostly to the chorus, to make it MORE generic. (the original idea)Again, special thanks to Andrea, RK and Aaron G.

- Sketch

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


FINAL FINAL DRAFT

Title: That Thing Goin' 'Round (special thanks to Andrea, RK and Aaron G)
Track Time: 00:00 Tempo/BPM: 130

VS 1
Have you heard about it -
COVID-19 goin' 'round? 
Seems to be spreadin' -
all over town

Hard to keep from gettin' -
you down 
That corona virus -
has been given a crown

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CH
Have you heard 'bout it?
That thing goin' 'round
Across the sea - over hill and dale
Target-ing - both strong and frail 

Challenges that we all share
Soon will be found everywhere
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

VS 2
Have you heard about it -
that virus goin' 'round? 
Gotta keep your distance
or you're goin' down

Cover your mouth
and wash your hands
That's the news
across the land

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH

VS 3
Have you heard about it -
shortages goin' 'round?
The world ran out of toilet rolls,  
hand sanitizer and pasta to boil 

The store shelves are empty
but the parking lot is full
Infection rates are rising
as the stock markets fall  

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH

VS 4
Have you heard about it -
isolation goin' 'round?
Can't go to the office -
they're all closed down

Caught on camera
helping folks who need ya
As evidence trending now
on social media 

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH/ending -- slower

We're now in a downward spiral
I hope at least this song goes viral

And if we're brought down to our knees 
don't forget to look up please

Take care of the ones you love
We'll survive with some help from above

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?


© Steve Lundgren 2020 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Okay. Here's a final draft. First draft below. Any more suggestions for changes accepted now.

FINAL DRAFT

Title: That Thing Goin' 'Round
Track Time: 00:00 Tempo/BPM: 00

VS 1
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round? 
Seems to be spreadin' -
all over town

Hard to keep from gettin' -
you down 
That thing goin' -
all over town

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH
Have you heard 'bout it?
That thing goin' 'round
Ain't no way 'round it
That thing goin' 'round

Can't go out now anywhere
They say that it's everywhere
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

VS 2
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round? 
Got to keep your distance
or you're goin' down

Cover your mouth
and wash your hands
That's the news
across the land

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH

VS 3
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
The world ran out of toilet rolls,  
hand sanitizer and pasta to boil 

The store shelves are empty
But the parking lot is full
Infection rates are rising
As the stock market falls 

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH

VS 4
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
Can't go to the office -
they're all closed down

Caught on camera
helping folks who need ya
As evidence trending now
on social media 

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH/ending -- slower

We're now in a downward spiral
I hope at least this song goes viral

And if we're brought down to our knees 
don't forget to look up please

Take care of the ones you love
We'll survive with some help from above

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FIRST DRAFT ---


This title/concept was inspired when I heard someone refer to a company being shut down as, "A lot of that going around."
Which could also be said of a contagion.

I roughed out some lyrics below.
But rather than work it up to my usual presentation level,
I left it a little rough so we could all work on it together.

So, input definitely welcome.

I hear this in a 1940s Pop/Jazz style accompaniment.
But open to other ideas.

- Sketch

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Title: That Thing Goin' 'Round
Track Time: 00:00 Tempo/BPM: 00

VS 1
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round? 
Seems to be spreadin' -
all over town

Hard to keep from gettin' -
you down 
That thing goin' -
all over town

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH
Have you heard 'bout it?
That thing goin' 'round
Ain't no way 'round it
That thing goin' 'round

VS 2
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round? 
Got to keep your distance
or you're goin' down

Cover your mouth
and wash your hands
That's the news
across the land

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH

VS 3
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
The world ran out of TP
We heard it on the TV

The store shelves are empty now
Still gotta get by somehow
Some folks will begin to roar
If they can find it in the store

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH

VS 4
Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
Can't go to the office -
they're all closed down

How are we supposed to live?
And try to re-main positive
It's happenin'
all over town

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

CH/ending






Last edited on Fri Apr 3rd, 2020 05:07 pm by Motorist Sketchbook

samiamiamsam
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It's awesome Sketch. I was wondering who would be the first to write about everything happening in the world.
Should have known it would be you.

It's scary to think about how all this is going to play out.
What's the endgame? All we can do is try to follow protocol by being safe, washing our hands, and not leaving the house unless it's absolutely necessary.
And prayer. Prayer is always a good thing.

Stay safe, friend.

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samiamiamsam wrote: It's awesome Sketch. I was wondering who would be the first to write about everything happening in the world.
Should have known it would be you.

It's scary to think about how all this is going to play out.
What's the endgame? All we can do is try to follow protocol by being safe, washing our hands, and not leaving the house unless it's absolutely necessary.
And prayer. Prayer is always a good thing.

Stay safe, friend.

Thanks, Sam.

One of my favorite guitarists, Mateus Asato, started a series titled:
The Quarantine Sessions (links to a couple of tracks below)

The Quarantine Sessions
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aOq9mYqPEwU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lYSmFufN3c

I was lamenting because I wanted to make a statement about
these extraordinary times as well. But I am already months behind on
my demo recordings. I simply do not have time for it.

Then I read a comment that spurred an idea. I wrote it down,
but was still not sure if I had time to pursue it. I launched a new
Evernote page for a new series of song lyrics and typed in the title.
Took a stab at it yesterday and then came back today to finish up.
I thought it would make an interesting forum project. See how it goes.

- Sketch

PS --- Something from Mateus Asato from five years ago.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PEBqZBW_Reg

Last edited on Mon Mar 23rd, 2020 02:01 am by Motorist Sketchbook

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Hey there,
after reading the piece over and over I'd like to add something that expresses how we here in GER feel.
Something like:

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
Self-appointed sheriffs
That is no lie

The people start to get mean
and outside nothing stays unseen
With the first light of the sun
the „spy“ awakes in every one

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

tgc and please be safe!
RK

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RainbowKeeper wrote: Hey there,
after reading the piece over and over I'd like to add something that expresses how we here in GER feel.
Something like:

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
Self-appointed sheriffs
That is no lie

The people start to get mean
and outside nothing stays unseen
With the first light of the sun
the „spy“ awakes in every one

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?

tgc and please be safe!
RK


That's interesting. Thanks.
Made me think about the martial law aspect.
But I don't think that is what you are saying.
You wrote "Self-appointed sheriffs".
What do you see happening where you are?

- Sketch

Andrea
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Hi Steve, I like the vibe on this. I'll try to add something an idea.

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
sick tally is up
stack market is down

They closed all the bridges
there is no where to run
social distance yourself
to kingdom come

RainbowKeeper
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Hey,

Let me try to explain it.
The government gave us very drastic rules to obey to stop a possible shutdown of whole Germany. We have to stay inside the house and are not allowed to have personal contact with anybody that is not a part of our closest family. You are only allowed to go to the grocery store real quick or take your dog for a walk. If you have a special permission you are allowed to go to work but even there you have to follow the rules, which means no talking to others and stuff like that.
Outside we are not allowed to interact with more than one person. Groups of more than 2 ppl are not allowed and even the ppl that work in minor important medical professions aren’t allowed to work.

So much about the rules.
But now, after weeks of rain and bad weather the sun came out. Spring arrived and many want to go outside.
And you won’t believe the number of ppl that started reporting things they saw on Facebook and other social media. They even take pictures of playing kids and write stuff like: how can this happen? The police needs to go there immediately....and so on. Yeah sometimes you really facepalm yourself when you read some of the stuff that’s not allowed but going on in public, but you get the feeling, that there might be some kind of „see-it-all“ neighbor behind some of the bushes that only waits...to take pictures when you give 2 kids their football back or if you wanna help an older couple carrying their groceries. We all know how dangerous this is and that we all have to protect ourselves but some here really behave as if the „Stasi“ still exists.
So I guess what I really wanted to say is, that situations like this can be good because we start thinking and get closer together as a community, but there are also those ppl that play „Mr. Very important“ and show the own mean character to the world. I mean imagine you are outside and you have to sneeze....and you start thinking: I hope no one saw this or heared this....and 20 min later you find a pic of yourself on Facebook with words like: why ain’t he in quarantine yet?!

So I guess this whole situation is also a time when ppl show the weaknesses of their character and Ego.
Besides that, we already had fights in supermarkets about cans of beans.... and I personally think, that this is a dangerous way to go and we need to stop that right away! But as long as there are some ppl having „corona-virus-parties“ at home, there will also be an „impo(r)tant“ person that takes a picture of you while you sneeze outside.

Oh This explanation got a little long but I hope you see my point and the two blades of the sword.

Tgc RK

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Andrea wrote: Hi Steve, I like the vibe on this. I'll try to add something an idea.

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
sick tally is up
stack market is down

They closed all the bridges
there is no where to run
social distance yourself
to kingdom come

Wow.
Those are some great ideas. Thanks.
I'll like the directional observation about sick tally up and stock market down.

Have they actually closed roadways and bridges where you live?
That's pretty scary.

- Sketch

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RainbowKeeper wrote: Hey,

Let me try to explain it.
The government gave us very drastic rules to obey to stop a possible shutdown of whole Germany. We have to stay inside the house and are not allowed to have personal contact with anybody that is not a part of our closest family. You are only allowed to go to the grocery store real quick or take your dog for a walk. If you have a special permission you are allowed to go to work but even there you have to follow the rules, which means no talking to others and stuff like that.
Outside we are not allowed to interact with more than one person. Groups of more than 2 ppl are not allowed and even the ppl that work in minor important medical professions aren’t allowed to work.

So much about the rules.
But now, after weeks of rain and bad weather the sun came out. Spring arrived and many want to go outside.
And you won’t believe the number of ppl that started reporting things they saw on Facebook and other social media. They even take pictures of playing kids and write stuff like: how can this happen? The police needs to go there immediately....and so on. Yeah sometimes you really facepalm yourself when you read some of the stuff that’s not allowed but going on in public, but you get the feeling, that there might be some kind of „see-it-all“ neighbor behind some of the bushes that only waits...to take pictures when you give 2 kids their football back or if you wanna help an older couple carrying their groceries. We all know how dangerous this is and that we all have to protect ourselves but some here really behave as if the „Stasi“ still exists.
So I guess what I really wanted to say is, that situations like this can be good because we start thinking and get closer together as a community, but there are also those ppl that play „Mr. Very important“ and show the own mean character to the world. I mean imagine you are outside and you have to sneeze....and you start thinking: I hope no one saw this or heared this....and 20 min later you find a pic of yourself on Facebook with words like: why ain’t he in quarantine yet?!

So I guess this whole situation is also a time when ppl show the weaknesses of their character and Ego.
Besides that, we already had fights in supermarkets about cans of beans.... and I personally think, that this is a dangerous way to go and we need to stop that right away! But as long as there are some ppl having „corona-virus-parties“ at home, there will also be an „impo(r)tant“ person that takes a picture of you while you sneeze outside.

Oh This explanation got a little long but I hope you see my point and the two blades of the sword.

Tgc RK

Very helpful explanation, thanks.
Can you take another try at those lyrics with what you wrote in mind?

I like the word "spies" you were using. Or maybe snitches, or informants,
tattle tales... Also the idea of peeking through bushes or over fences to rat-out (rat on)
neighbors. And the social media aspect. Helped an elder couple and now I'm
criticized (now featured - or trending) on Facebook (like a crook - rhymes)
Wow. this is fun. - lol

- Sketch

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Hey,

Yvw and I promise that I will give it another try. Thanks for your ideas for the lyrics. I hope I find a way to put all I feel in these few lines. Cause in fact I’m so mad about this that I could write an exclusive „new Stasi-founded!?“ song about this.

Tgc
RK

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RainbowKeeper wrote: Hey,

Yvw and I promise that I will give it another try. Thanks for your ideas for the lyrics. I hope I find a way to put all I feel in these few lines. Cause in fact I’m so mad about this that I could write an exclusive „new Stasi-founded!?“ song about this.

Tgc
RK

Emotion is the BEST place to write from. Express yourself however you can.
And it might not be a "one or the other" situation, but BOTH.
You have my support no matter how this works out for you.

May peace and blessings be upon you and your family.

- Sketch

Last edited on Tue Mar 24th, 2020 07:07 pm by Motorist Sketchbook

Andrea
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Motorist Sketchbook wrote:
Andrea wrote: Hi Steve, I like the vibe on this. I'll try to add something an idea.

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
sick tally is up
stack market is down

They closed all the bridges
there is no where to run
social distance yourself
to kingdom come

Wow.
Those are some great ideas. Thanks.
I'll like the directional observation about sick tally up and stock market down.

Have they actually closed roadways and bridges where you live?
That's pretty scary.

- Sketch



They haven't closed the bridges yet, but they are talking about closing all the bridges to NYC. There are over 12,000 confirmed cases in NYC so I think closing the bridges will keep them all on an island and stop the spread out of NYC. They probably won't close the bridges near me (about 90 minutes from NYC). I sure hope they don't until my son returns from college. I want him to stay in Binghamton for now because they have very few reposted cases.

Unlike RK, the sun just came out, so my family will probably go out for a walk in the neighborhood soon.

Stay safe :)

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Andrea wrote: Motorist Sketchbook wrote:
Andrea wrote: Hi Steve, I like the vibe on this. I'll try to add something an idea.

Have you heard about
that thing goin' 'round?
sick tally is up
stack market is down

They closed all the bridges
there is no where to run
social distance yourself
to kingdom come

Wow.
Those are some great ideas. Thanks.
I'll like the directional observation about sick tally up and stock market down.

Have they actually closed roadways and bridges where you live?
That's pretty scary.

- Sketch



They haven't closed the bridges yet, but they are talking about closing all the bridges to NYC. There are over 12,000 confirmed cases in NYC so I think closing the bridges will keep them all on an island and stop the spread out of NYC. They probably won't close the bridges near me (about 90 minutes from NYC). I sure hope they don't until my son returns from college. I want him to stay in Binghamton for now because they have very few reposted cases.

Unlike RK, the sun just came out, so my family will probably go out for a walk in the neighborhood soon.

Stay safe :)

Thanks for the update from your state. (that rhymes - lol)

Speaking of bridges, I'm glad I don't "burn them" with previous employers.
My office is closed but I reached out to a few previous employers.
One of whom booked a day of work for me later this week. Sweet.

I need to get some rest though. I am suffering from whiplash from being
rear-ended in an auto accident last week. I'm in a bit of pain.
It only hurts when I get stressed out.

- Sketch

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Car accidents suck. Sorry you were hurt. Not a good time to go see a doctor though, so I hope you feel better soon. Work is a tough situation for many with so many places shut down. My husband and son are working from home. Glad they are working, can't wait until they go back to offices!

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Been out with the dog and this came to my mind:

Sneezing in public makes you a witch
Friendly neighbors have a perfect pitch
These Stoolies always „have a look“
Later you find your picture on Facebook
Don’t know in what bushes they hide
But they stay there until ya‘ identified

Don’t know if it fits but maybe you can put it right. Got a little „head trouble“ atm.
BTW we just got the new government rules...
Meeting with more than 2 ppl is 200€
Visiting a hospital or a seniors residence also 200€
If you open your bar or café....it’s 4000€ the first time climbing up to 25.000€ if you try it repeatedly.
I also found videos of the famous, always crowded German Autobahn (highway).....it’s empty.... I mean in some areas you have 10 cars per half an hour!

Anyway I will rest a little. Already in a dark room. And sorry to hear that you have had an accident! Hope your better soon!

RK

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RainbowKeeper wrote: Been out with the dog and this came to my mind:

Sneezing in public makes you a witch
Friendly neighbors have a perfect pitch
These Stoolies always „have a look“
Later you find your picture on Facebook
Don’t know in what bushes they hide
But they stay there until ya‘ identified

Don’t know if it fits but maybe you can put it right. Got a little „head trouble“ atm.
BTW we just got the new government rules...
Meeting with more than 2 ppl is 200€
Visiting a hospital or a seniors residence also 200€
If you open your bar or café....it’s 4000€ the first time climbing up to 25.000€ if you try it repeatedly.
I also found videos of the famous, always crowded German Autobahn (highway).....it’s empty.... I mean in some areas you have 10 cars per half an hour!

Anyway I will rest a little. Already in a dark room. And sorry to hear that you have had an accident! Hope your better soon!

RK

Those are some good ideas for lyrics. Thanks for the input. (and additional effort)

Wow. Those fines are crazy. They really sound serious about this.
Do those measures seem justified in the least by the heath situation? 
I'm guessing you will say, "No!"

I don't know of anyone who is sick, or that knows anyone who is sick.
It does concern me to find out that this was a leak from a biological weapons lab.
There is a connection with a lab in Canada with the one in China.
The very city of the outbreak. Here's a link to part one of a short series of three videos.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sf6PLL4N_2U&t=639s
Very informative.

These biological weapon viruses are actually patented as inventions. WTF?
Valuable inventions that need infringement protection, I guess.
Valuable to whom?

- Sketch

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Andrea wrote: Car accidents suck. Sorry you were hurt. Not a good time to go see a doctor though, so I hope you feel better soon. Work is a tough situation for many with so many places shut down. My husband and son are working from home. Glad they are working, can't wait until they go back to offices!
Thanks, Andrea.
I was able to see my personal Chiropractor.
He works out of his home and is still seeing patients.
We were both surprised to find all my bones in alignment.
The whiplash is muscular. So, I just need to get some rest and heal.
Good timing with little work to do now.

But we are all itching to get back to it. This is bad.
I hope your situation improves quickly as well.
Especially with family in various places.

- Sketch

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All I can say is, these punishments are needed. There are still some crazy ppl out there having „virus-Partys“ with friends and neighbors. The most „braindead“ thing I heared today is that some youngsters use all this to test their courage. One of this tests was to lick the hands area of an escalator in some mall in Bavaria. They still aren’t sure if the guy who did it has IT or not. Amazing mh?

Over here we have some famous politicians that got the virus, so that even our chancellor-ette had chosen to go in quarantine for a few weeks and have some tests done.

We have heared that the new orders we got already should have helped. But that’s it, no further info on that.

RK

Ps: enjoy playing with my lyrics 😉

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RainbowKeeper wrote: All I can say is, these punishments are needed. There are still some crazy ppl out there having „virus-Partys“ with friends and neighbors. The most „braindead“ thing I heared today is that some youngsters use all this to test their courage. One of this tests was to lick the hands area of an escalator in some mall in Bavaria. They still aren’t sure if the guy who did it has IT or not. Amazing mh?

Over here we have some famous politicians that got the virus, so that even our chancellor-ette had chosen to go in quarantine for a few weeks and have some tests done.

We have heared that the new orders we got already should have helped. But that’s it, no further info on that.

RK

Ps: enjoy playing with my lyrics 😉

I remember you mentioned the virus parties earlier.
What does that involve?

- Sketch

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Mostly just „normal“ partys 🥳 with lots of ppl and music and dance and so on. While, I told you, meetings with more than 2 ppl are forbidden and are punished with 200€. Meetings with over 10 ppl (party) are criminal acts now and those ppl can party in jail now.

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RainbowKeeper wrote: Mostly just „normal“ partys 🥳 with lots of ppl and music and dance and so on. While, I told you, meetings with more than 2 ppl are forbidden and are punished with 200€. Meetings with over 10 ppl (party) are criminal acts now and those ppl can party in jail now.
Thanks.
This topic is very educational.

I was thinking I probably need to get the demo recorded while it is still relevant.
A rush project. That would be a good problem to have. - lol

- Sketch

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Agreed!
Rk

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RainbowKeeper wrote: Agreed!
Rk

While eating lunch (leftover egg rolls), I had a thought.
Egg rolls do that to me. -lol

You should write the song you are thinking of in your own native tongue.
Or a combination of German and English. I loved that Rammstein, Du Hast, song when it was on the radio here.

Anyway, those of us who are limited to speaking English will need a rough translation. But it would be so interesting to see how you write lyrics in your native tongue.

- Sketch

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So you are a Rammstein Fan hu?
I do remember the song: „du hast“ and I hope you don’t think this means „I hate“....if so the band found another translation-victim ^^

I dunno why, but I don’t write songs in German. Never enjoyed doing that. Poems and short stories yeah, but that’s it. Sometimes (as you might have noticed) I write in French but not that often anymore. But if there is a song, or an artist that really impressed me, I write in francais. But I normally use English for songs. Don’t know why, maybe out of the trauma I had from my first English teacher...,I have no clue. Sure I’m not native and all ya slang words and cuss-words are usually new to me, but I try my best.
But you know what, I really appreciate it if someone (tries to) speak German with me. Yes it’s difficult for most of you, but German can be very beautiful. And no we don’t always „yell“ or scream in this angry style.😉
And there are a lot of German songs that are amazingly written, but they would lose sooooo much in translation!

RK

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RainbowKeeper wrote: So you are a Rammstein Fan hu?
I do remember the song: „du hast“ and I hope you don’t think this means „I hate“....if so the band found another translation-victim ^^

I dunno why, but I don’t write songs in German. Never enjoyed doing that. Poems and short stories yeah, but that’s it. Sometimes (as you might have noticed) I write in French but not that often anymore. But if there is a song, or an artist that really impressed me, I write in francais. But I normally use English for songs. Don’t know why, maybe out of the trauma I had from my first English teacher...,I have no clue. Sure I’m not native and all ya slang words and cuss-words are usually new to me, but I try my best.
But you know what, I really appreciate it if someone (tries to) speak German with me. Yes it’s difficult for most of you, but German can be very beautiful. And no we don’t always „yell“ or scream in this angry style.😉
And there are a lot of German songs that are amazingly written, but they would lose sooooo much in translation!

RK

Okay, thanks for considering it.
And I think all languages have there own beauty. Russian is the common language in the lab where I work. I told the boss, "I love the sound of Russian in the morning." - lol
I am out of the lab all day delivering for them. But I have a great appreciation for their culture.

- Sketch

PS -- My neighbors are Austrian. They speak German to each other. Although I remember the children always answering in English.

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From Austria hu? Well in that case: frag sie mal ob sie dich auf ein Stück Sachertorte einladen! 😉

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RainbowKeeper wrote: From Austria hu? Well in that case: frag sie mal ob sie dich auf ein Stück Sachertorte einladen! 😉
Mmm... Yes, that would be delicious. - lol
(I do have a sweet tooth)

- Sketch

Ja, das wäre lecker. - lol
(Ich habe einen süßen Zahn)

Last edited on Thu Mar 26th, 2020 01:06 am by Motorist Sketchbook

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See? 😉 I got you! ^^

I often hear stuff like: what does „playing“ with words give you? Or: why are you interested in languages? Computers are the future!....maybe
But I think of words as an ability to „move“. Every single word is a step and any conversation is a way that both ppl start to walk on, towards each other. Yes even if it’s some kind of fight or angry discussion. Talking means moving...that’s me and that’s what I believe in. And if I don’t get rich, I maybe touched a few others and can feel good within.
Oh before I forget....ya welcome to comment my stuff, too. Just take a step towards me 😉

RK

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RainbowKeeper wrote: See? 😉 I got you! ^^

I often hear stuff like: what does „playing“ with words give you? Or: why are you interested in languages? Computers are the future!....maybe
But I think of words as an ability to „move“. Every single word is a step and any conversation is a way that both ppl start to walk on, towards each other. Yes even if it’s some kind of fight or angry discussion. Talking means moving...that’s me and that’s what I believe in. And if I don’t get rich, I maybe touched a few others and can feel good within.
Oh before I forget....ya welcome to comment my stuff, too. Just take a step towards me 😉

RK

Thanks.
I just posted a new song demo if you want to take another step. - lol

- Sketch

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I will, but not tonight. It’s already 1.45 am and I’m ready for bed....

Will listen to it later.

Tgc
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RainbowKeeper wrote: I will, but not tonight. It’s already 1.45 am and I’m ready for bed....

Will listen to it later.

Tgc
RK

Angenehme Träume.

- Sketch


Last edited on Thu Mar 26th, 2020 01:51 am by Motorist Sketchbook

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Okay. Time to write the final draft on this.
Thanks to Rainbow Keeper and Andrea for such great input.
And to Sam for the encouragement.

I'll put the final draft in the OP (opening post) post #1 page 1.

- Sketch

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Final draft now posted in the OP (opening post) post #1 page 1.
Last chance for comments.

- Sketch

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Hey Steve, You did a nice job incorporating different ideas. I have a feeling if we give some more time, we will have a few more ideas to add. Can't wait until it's not goin' round!

Thanks for stimulating this fun composition :)

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Andrea wrote: Hey Steve, You did a nice job incorporating different ideas. I have a feeling if we give some more time, we will have a few more ideas to add. Can't wait until it's not goin' round!

Thanks for stimulating this fun composition :)

Yup. Thanks, Andrea.

It will be so nice to get back to a normal life. 

I was hoping this would be an opportunity to come together as a global community,
since this is affecting us all. I really appreciated the other perspectives from yourself and Rainbow Keeper.
And as you say, there may be other ideas to feed into this. But...

The song is long enough now. So anything added will mean something needs to be removed.
Which is fine, if we are improving the song. Choices will have to be made.

I have already begun to lay down recorded tracks for the song accompaniment
in anticipation of final lyrics.

- Sketch

Last edited on Mon Mar 30th, 2020 11:50 am by Motorist Sketchbook

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I can't wait to hear the final song :)

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Andrea wrote: I can't wait to hear the final song :)
Thanks, Andrea.
That's what I love most about this songwriting process.
The tangible things that are created.

And for me, it's a bit of a crap shoot. I typically don't know
going into it exactly what the final will sound like.
Always a product of the process. Sort of mysterious that way.
The songs take on a life of their own. You get what you get.
Provided you keep after it until it is done.
AND you know when to CALL it done.

- Sketch

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Here's a great review of the current lyrics set from a record Producer friend of mine.
Any thoughts on this?

- Sketch

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey Sketch,

Cool song.  I feel like it could be really catchy.  I think you have a good sense of phrases that would work good in a song.  I wouldn’t have thought to use that when I said it.  But common phrases like that seem to work well.

Some constructive criticism would be that I think the first line of the song needs to be stronger.  Something that gets people’s attention and makes them want to know more.  Also, if you can set the tone of the song right away, that’s good too.  Right now, I have no idea that you are talking about the virus until the 2nd half of the 2nd verse.  If someone heard this song 10 years from now, and had no idea what was going on in the world when it was written, they’d probably be really confused.

One idea, instead of saying that “thing” goin round’, replace “thing” with a different word each verse.  Like the first verse could be virus, then plague, sickness, layoffs.  I’d brainstorm a bunch of words that have to do with what’s going on and see what fits. 

A few more words:
Pink slips
Bio weapon
Bad news
Fake news
Panic
fear
Hoarders

Those are a few to get started.  Just my $.02

-Aaron

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What great advice. We should do some more thinking and tinkering. Wish I had a producer friend too :)

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Andrea wrote: What great advice. We should do some more thinking and tinkering. Wish I had a producer friend too :)
Yes. We all need to leverage our resources. Grow your network intentionally.

I made good progress on the accompaniment recording today.
But we need to get back to work on the lyrics. Feel free to jump into the suggestions given and try writing something. Thanks.

I need to work tomorrow for a while and then I will jump in as time allows.

- Sketch

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Motorist Sketchbook wrote:
Andrea wrote: What great advice. We should do some more thinking and tinkering. Wish I had a producer friend too :)
Yes. We all need to leverage our resources. Grow your network intentionally.

I made good progress on the accompaniment recording today.
But we need to get back to work on the lyrics. Feel free to jump into the suggestions given and try writing something. Thanks.

I need to work tomorrow for a while and then I will jump in as time allows.
- Sketch


I will look at the lyrics tomorrow. I am working on 5 hours of sleep and starting to lose focus. Not sure how to grow my network, but am listening to all advice. Talk soon :)

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Motorist Sketchbook wrote:
Here's a great review of the current lyrics set from a record Producer friend of mine.
Any thoughts on this?

- Sketch

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey Sketch,

Cool song.  I feel like it could be really catchy.  I think you have a good sense of phrases that would work good in a song.  I wouldn’t have thought to use that when I said it.  But common phrases like that seem to work well.

Some constructive criticism would be that I think the first line of the song needs to be stronger.  Something that gets people’s attention and makes them want to know more.  Also, if you can set the tone of the song right away, that’s good too.  Right now, I have no idea that you are talking about the virus until the 2nd half of the 2nd verse.  If someone heard this song 10 years from now, and had no idea what was going on in the world when it was written, they’d probably be really confused.

One idea, instead of saying that “thing” goin round’, replace “thing” with a different word each verse.  Like the first verse could be virus, then plague, sickness, layoffs.  I’d brainstorm a bunch of words that have to do with what’s going on and see what fits. 

A few more words:
Pink slips
Bio weapon
Bad news
Fake news
Panic
fear
Hoarders

Those are a few to get started.  Just my $.02

-Aaron



Okay, not really a finished product, but maybe something to work with?


Have you heard
bout that virus around
Seems to be spreadin' -
all over town

Cover your mouth
and wash your hands
That's the news
across the land

ten people or less
six feet apart
parties are busted
before they start

store shelves empty
parking lot's full
Infection rates rise
As stock markets falls

Have you heard
bout that virus around
Seems to be spreadin' -
all over town

Hard to keep
from gettin' - you down
trying to live (survive)
in a ghost town


Have you heard
a pandemics at hand
Seems to be spreadin' -
across the lands

over the seas
and over the dale
targets the sick
as well as the frail

nonessentials
work from home
so they can avert
the killer syndrome

Rainbows in widows
to calm the fear
offering hope
and Springtime cheer

Have you heard
a pandemics at hand
Seems to be spreadin' -
across the lands

Hard to keep
from gettin' - you down
trying to live (survive)
in a ghost town

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Andrea wrote: Motorist Sketchbook wrote:
Here's a great review of the current lyrics set from a record Producer friend of mine.
Any thoughts on this?

- Sketch

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey Sketch,

Cool song.  I feel like it could be really catchy.  I think you have a good sense of phrases that would work good in a song.  I wouldn’t have thought to use that when I said it.  But common phrases like that seem to work well.

Some constructive criticism would be that I think the first line of the song needs to be stronger.  Something that gets people’s attention and makes them want to know more.  Also, if you can set the tone of the song right away, that’s good too.  Right now, I have no idea that you are talking about the virus until the 2nd half of the 2nd verse.  If someone heard this song 10 years from now, and had no idea what was going on in the world when it was written, they’d probably be really confused.

One idea, instead of saying that “thing” goin round’, replace “thing” with a different word each verse.  Like the first verse could be virus, then plague, sickness, layoffs.  I’d brainstorm a bunch of words that have to do with what’s going on and see what fits. 

A few more words:
Pink slips
Bio weapon
Bad news
Fake news
Panic
fear
Hoarders

Those are a few to get started.  Just my $.02

-Aaron



Okay, not really a finished product, but maybe something to work with?


Have you heard
bout that virus around
Seems to be spreadin' -
all over town

Cover your mouth
and wash your hands
That's the news
across the land

ten people or less
six feet apart
parties are busted
before they start

store shelves empty
parking lot's full
Infection rates rise
As stock markets falls

Have you heard
bout that virus around
Seems to be spreadin' -
all over town

Hard to keep
from gettin' - you down
trying to live (survive)
in a ghost town


Have you heard
a pandemics at hand
Seems to be spreadin' -
across the lands

over the seas
and over the dale
targets the sick
as well as the frail

nonessentials
work from home
so they can avert
the killer syndrome

Rainbows in widows
to calm the fear
offering hope
and Springtime cheer

Have you heard
a pandemics at hand
Seems to be spreadin' -
across the lands

Hard to keep
from gettin' - you down
trying to live (survive)
in a ghost town

I see lots of good ideas there. Thanks.
Not a finished piece, as you said. But another step in the right direction.

- Sketch

PS -- I should have some time tomorrow to give all this a harder look.
Thanks again for your efforts, I appreciate it.

The accompaniment is coming along nicely. I keep listening to it over and over.
Usually a good sign. Hard to imagine that it sounded like crap three days ago. - lol

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I feel the need at this point to clarify my objectives on this piece
before I move forward.This is primarily for my own clarity of purpose.
But will serve to inform others. And speaks to the process of songwriting
and shows how I stay on track personally.

I have appreciated the help I have received, but I need to stay on track
with my original intention while I build the final item. "A camel is a horse built by committee.",
as the saying goes. So, I certainly want to avoid that outcome. A statement
at this point is the best way for me to stay focused and will be the best way to
view the outcome of this set of revisions.

My original intention was to apply the saying, "There's a lot of that going around.",
which was actually in reference to a company closing, to the current virus and to
everything that goes with it. Like the aforementioned company closing. BUT...
the saying has far-reaching application, since it was in common use long
before COVID19. So, I want to keep this thought in mind while we
move forward with some terrific additions.

Having defined the scope of the project we can begin to build into it the other
aspects.Aaron's comment about grounding this song historically in the current event
is a must. Ten or twenty years down the road, I want this current event
to be the obvious timestamp.

Beyond that we have a whole list of items we are building into the song.
Thanks againto the participants that gave this song a national and global perspective.

The final thing is the conclusion statement at the end of the song that developed
in this last revision. Rather than be satisfied with a historic statement, or simply as a
complaining rant, I feel the need to add a message of hope from my perspective.
This is a part of the larger purpose of my music as a whole. To make a statement.
I need to remain true to myself and my convictions. (but remain respectful of others)
Which is a tall order sometimes.

- Sketch

Last edited on Fri Apr 3rd, 2020 02:24 pm by Motorist Sketchbook

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Sketch, Always thought of this as your song. Just wanted to add some ideas - use or lose any and all. The last ideas were not meant to be a replacement, so was not written in that way with the repetition and ending. Just throwing out ideas per request. Stepping back and I'll look forward to hearing your song.

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Andrea wrote: Sketch, Always thought of this as your song. Just wanted to add some ideas - use or lose any and all. The last ideas were not meant to be a replacement, so was not written in that way with the repetition and ending. Just throwing out ideas per request. Stepping back and I'll look forward to hearing your song.
No worries. Sorry if you felt slapped around by my post. Not my intention.
I appreciate your help and completely understood your stance and did not feel anything was being taken from me.

I'm working on the FINAL FINAL draft now. Your comments are ALWAYS welcome. Thanks.

- Sketch

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Okay. A FINAL FINAL (meaningless term - lol) draft is posted to the OP (post #1).
Any more suggestions for changes accepted now.Plan is to record vocals Saturday 04/04/2020.

Biggest changes made here were to the first verse, the beginning of each verse AND
mostly to the chorus, to make it MORE generic. (the original idea)Again, special thanks to Andrea, RK and Aaron G.

- Sketch


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