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| Posted: Thu Mar 5th, 2020 03:54 am |
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Becki5
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“Justify”
Why is it so hard for others to accept what’s true
Why is it so hard, can’t they understand the love I feel for you
It’s not about being right or wrong,
It’s about needing to move on
Because this is a choice I’ve made of mine
It’s not for other’s to decide
Let it be known your rules don’t apply,
You live your life and I’ll live mine
Justify
Justify
Nothing here to justify
You live your life, I’ll live mine
We don’t need to see eye to eye
I’ve respected your wishes, now you respect mine
This is who I am, not changing my mind
What’s it going to take for you to see?
I can’t go on not living like me
Take precautions, do what you need to do
I’m moving on, there’s nothing I need to prove
You’ve made your bed, now in it you lie,
There’s nothing here to be justified
Justify
Justify
Nothing here to justify
You live your life, I’ll live mine
We don’t need to see eye to eye
Justify
Justify
Nothing here to justify
I’m so tired of living a lie
This is me so stop asking, “Why?”Last edited on Mon Mar 9th, 2020 12:47 am by Becki5
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| Posted: Thu Mar 5th, 2020 02:55 pm |
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RainbowKeeper
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hey there,
first of all I love the messege you're givin here. Mind your own buissnes and let me live in peace is a very strong topic for a song!
there are many lines I like a lot but the ending ones:
Justify
Justify
Nothing here to justify
I’m so tired of living a lie
This is me so stop asking, “Why?”
I love those lines and they have a strong character. Very well said.
Personaly there are three little things that came to my mind while reading...1. You end a lilttle often on "mine"
2. You rhyme in the first 4 lines of each verse, if you do that also in the second 4 lines it would make it a little bit more "round" to me3. the line: We don’t need to see eye to eye...don't know if you guys say it like this, but I would change the see into a "meet"
but after all, who am I to justify! ^^
Good work!RK
Last edited on Thu Mar 5th, 2020 02:59 pm by RainbowKeeper
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| Posted: Thu Mar 5th, 2020 06:54 pm |
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Becki5
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Hey RK! How are you? Thank you for all of the great advice and for taking the time to do so. Thank you for pointing out the repetitive use of the word "mine.' I agree, way overused. I will have to work on that.
I believe all of my lines do rhyme. So, I am not sure what you mean by rounding off my rhyme scheme.
The word "meet" would be a great fit for "see" if I want to change it around. Definitely something to think about.
I like your closing statement: "but after all, who am I to justify! ^^
Good work!RK"
Haha! That was cute! Thank you!
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| Posted: Thu Mar 5th, 2020 08:41 pm |
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RainbowKeeper
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Hey becki,
First of all yvw! It’s not even work for me because I love the word playing lyric stuff. And I think honest feedback is the best thing a writer can get. So feel free to put your comments under my stuff 
About the rhymes... I’m not sure where you see those rhyming lines. When I look at your ending words:
True ax
You ax
Wrong b
On c
Mine d
Decide e
Apply f
Mine g
Mine h
Mind I
See jx
Me jx
Do k
Prove l
Lye Mx
Justify mx
.... I can’t figure out a clear rhyme system.
That‘s what I wanted to say.
And well I was just honest it’s your baby and even if I d say it’s hair is to long or it doesn’t wear the right clothes...who am I to testify ^^
Have a good one
RK
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| Posted: Thu Mar 5th, 2020 10:45 pm |
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Becki5
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Hi RK!
Okay, now I understand what you mean. You are talking about the rhyme scheme (pattern). I thought you meant it generally didn’t rhyme. Thank you for explaining. And, it’s cool, I want you to be honest. I’m learning as I go, so if I question something, it’s because I am trying to figure this whole songwriting thing out. Take good care!
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| Posted: Thu Mar 5th, 2020 11:14 pm |
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RainbowKeeper
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Yep exactly...sorry but if it gets to technical I usually search for the right word...that happens sometimes if English is not your first language
But I have 3 different ones in my mind, that makes it a little bit more difficult sometimes.
But yeah those rhymes...glad that u know now what I tried to say ^^
Tgcy
RK
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| Posted: Fri Mar 6th, 2020 11:28 pm |
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Andrea
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Hi Becki5, first, I did find I was able to easily read this with a rhythm.
I was confused with this line:
"Why is it so hard, can’t they understand the love I feel for you"
The song is about moving on, so this line doesn't make sense to me.
RK has offered some great suggestions, so I will try not to repeat. I agree with RK, the message comes through strong and it is empowering. My thoughts as I read would be to try to add more "show" in the lyrics.
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| Posted: Sat Mar 7th, 2020 12:44 am |
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Becki5
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Andrea wrote:
Hi Becki5, first, I did find I was able to easily read this with a rhythm.
I was confused with this line:
"Why is it so hard, can’t they understand the love I feel for you"
The song is about moving on, so this line doesn't make sense to me.
RK has offered some great suggestions, so I will try not to repeat. I agree with RK, the message comes through strong and it is empowering. My thoughts as I read would be to try to add more "show" in the lyrics.
Hey Andrea! Thank you for your response! These lyrics are not one of my best and I realize (like most works) that improvements need to be made. Sometimes I do not see what other people see and/or try to understand their perspective on the work/piece. So, here I am, once again, learning.
I totally understand what you meant by the line, “Why is it so hard, can’t they understand the love I feel for you,” since (you are correct) the song is about needing to move on. However, it is about others needing to move on because they do not agree with who I chose to love or be in a relationship with, in life. I should have chose my words better after using the word “you” in that line and then continued to use the word “you” in the rest of the lyrics.
“You” in the remaining lines of the lyrics is referring to the people who I do not feel I need to justify my life choices to. I hope this makes sense.
And, I agree about adding “show” to my lyrics. The best lyrics are told like stories where you can create an image.
Thank you for taking the time to contribute your advice Andrea! 
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| Posted: Sun Mar 8th, 2020 11:48 pm |
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RainbowKeeper
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LOL yeah I noticed that 2 but as a non-American I thought that it’s some special slang or something, so I kept it that way. 😅
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Becki5
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Motorist Sketchbook wrote:
Just in case no one else caught it... "lye" should be spelled "lie". (unless you a making soap - lol)
And "lay" would be better English, but doesn't rhyme.
- Sketch
Sketch! Thank you! I honestly didn’t even notice. Good call! And....hahaha.....I like the soap comment. I will edit that. Thanks again!
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Becki5
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RainbowKeeper wrote:
LOL yeah I noticed that 2 but as a non-American I thought that it’s some special slang or something, so I kept it that way. 😅
Hi RK! It’s okay to say something. Everyone knows you are here to help and support others. That’s what this board is about. And, guess what, in this situation, you knew more than this American.....hahaha. Good call RK! Last edited on Mon Mar 9th, 2020 12:59 am by Becki5
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RainbowKeeper
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Mea culpa lol
And btw I would be so happy if someone would comment my „candle“ I really need some help on that one...
But I guess no one is interested in it...
So lie lye lu.... let us see the re-worked version of justify soon.
Tgc
RK
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