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Forgive Me
 Moderated by: Troy33, RainyDayMan, HankTheTank
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 Posted: Wed Jan 29th, 2020 06:50 pm
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cmaja
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Wrote this a while back. Typical blues format —AABA. CMA

Forgive Me
____________AABA

A1:
Forgive me, I didn’t know
How much you love me, so
Forgive me, I didn’t see
How much you mean to me
I lost my heart
We are apart
I am to blame
I pray someday I’ll lose this pain

A2:
Forgive me, give me a chance
To save our once romance
Forgive me, I’ll change my style
You’ve been sweet all the while
I’m so ashamed
I’ll take the blame
You were so true
I pray someday I’ll be like you

Bridge:
Recall the days together, it was forever, our love was true
And all the years you’ve known me, now I’m so lonely, can you try to

A3:
Forgive me, I pray you’ll show
To me, that I may know
You live free, and love will be
Whatever you decree
I need to change
And rearrange
My heart for you
And may someday show that I’m true

(Musical Bridge)

A3: (build)
Forgive me, I pray you’ll show
To me, that I may know
You live free, and love will be
Whatever you decree
I need to change
And rearrange
My heart for you
And may someday show that I’m true

© 2018 Charles M Anderson

Last edited on Tue Feb 4th, 2020 05:30 pm by cmaja



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 Posted: Wed Jan 29th, 2020 10:59 pm
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RainyDayMan
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I don't know if it will fit the structure you want Charles, but reading this I found myself saying:

How much you love me, love me so
and
How much you mean, mean to me

especially if this is slow and moody there might be room to try something along those lines.

I really like your bridge and the rhyming scheme there.

It has a definite mood and vibe going which is great.

There's a couple of lines that felt just a bit out to me:
I pray someday I’m worth my salt
I know you merit praise
not exactly sure why, just didn't seem to flow smoothly from the previous lines.

But overall it has mood and a good feel, and seems to fit neatly with the musical style you have in mind.



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 Posted: Sun Feb 2nd, 2020 06:12 am
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cmaja
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Hey RD Man, I’ll take what you said to heart and maybe change it a little. I’m kinda under the weather now. I’ll get to it eventually.


Charles



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 Posted: Sun Feb 2nd, 2020 06:46 am
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RainyDayMan
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No problem Charles. You usually have a clear idea of how you want your songs to be, so use or lose as you see fit.



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 Posted: Tue Feb 4th, 2020 05:32 pm
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cmaja
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Okay, RD Man. I changed it a little based upon your suggestions. Thanks,

Charles



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