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Past Illusions
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 Posted: Thu Oct 17th, 2019 04:32 am
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cmaja
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I wrote this in ‘95 and changed it a little earlier this year. It kinda has an early 1960s vibe to it.

Past Illusions
______________Verse/Chorus
Verse 1:       
It was a song remembered
It was a distant day
She carved letters in her diary
She neatly tucked away

Verse 2:       
And always it was Sunday
And always did it shine
She wandered in distant memories
She always seemed to find

Chorus 1:     
Forever past illusions
That come and go like wants and needs
Forever past illusions
That became her in-betweens

Verse 3:       
There was a time she had love
There was that sunny day
She lost love that silent morning
She turned her man away

Chorus 1: 
Forever past illusions
That come and go like wants and needs
Forever past illusions
That became her in-betweens

Verse 4:       
I listened to her story
I heard it on replay
Talked to her in her remembrance
And then she let me stay

Chorus 2:     
I stole her past illusions
That came and went like hopes and dreams
I stole her past illusions
And became her in-betweens

(Instrumental break)

Chorus 1: 
Forever past illusions
That come and go like wants and needs
Forever past illusions
That became her in-betweens

Chorus 2: 
I stole her past illusions
That came and went like hopes and dreams
I stole her past illusions
And became her in-betweens

© 1995 Charles M Anderson

Last edited on Fri Nov 8th, 2019 08:04 pm by cmaja



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 Posted: Thu Oct 17th, 2019 10:58 am
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Wallabie
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Hi Charles,

well just a short feedback - I think the flow of the lyrics is good and the lyrics itself are cool. Enjoyed the read

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 Posted: Thu Oct 17th, 2019 03:35 pm
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bunnythesinger
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Charles, Geat rocky song.. Appropriate repitition of the hook..develops a nice story...resolves great. Good write.

Bunny

Last edited on Thu Oct 17th, 2019 03:36 pm by bunnythesinger



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 Posted: Fri Oct 18th, 2019 05:15 pm
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cmaja
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Thanks for the positive comments, guys. I can’t remember the inspiration for writing this but it may have been a Beatles song.

Charles



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 Posted: Tue Nov 5th, 2019 04:34 pm
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Wallabie
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Hi Charles,
may I ask - do you have any plans for the Lyric? While reading the words a melody crossed my ears and it´s still there. I would love to give it a try and record something, if you give me the permission to do so.

Cheerz

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 Posted: Tue Nov 5th, 2019 06:12 pm
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cmaja
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Wallabie wrote:
Hi Charles,
may I ask - do you have any plans for the Lyric? While reading the words a melody crossed my ears and it´s still there. I would love to give it a try and record something, if you give me the permission to do so.

Cheerz


Yes, I appreciate you putting it to music. It’s been sitting on a shelf for over two decades and this is it first debut. If you need any help, let me know. You can use my email on my profile or send me a PM. Thanks.

Charles



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 Posted: Tue Nov 5th, 2019 10:42 pm
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Andrea
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Hi Charles, I am liking this a lot. I could picture and hear this as I read it - awesome. All is flowing nice until V4. Then something happens (she meets another man?). I don't understand the change in chorus. If this is the case, I would prefer it was more explicit (just my opinion). I may be misunderstanding, but this is my issue.

One small suggestion: "She lost love in that silent morning": She lost her love that silent morning



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 Posted: Fri Nov 8th, 2019 07:59 pm
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cmaja
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Andrea wrote:
Hi Charles, I am liking this a lot. I could picture and hear this as I read it - awesome. All is flowing nice until V4. Then something happens (she meets another man?). I don't understand the change in chorus. If this is the case, I would prefer it was more explicit (just my opinion). I may be misunderstanding, but this is my issue.

One small suggestion: "She lost love in that silent morning": She lost her love that silent morning


Thanks Andrea for the suggestion; I’ll probably use it. V4 and chorus 2 is the singer interjecting himself into her illusion and becoming her renewed lover.

Charles



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 Posted: Fri Nov 8th, 2019 09:31 pm
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Andrea
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Sounds like I was on the right track with V4 and C2. It takes some thinking to draw that conclusion, but sometimes that is a really good thing. I can't wait to hear it :)



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 Posted: Fri Nov 8th, 2019 10:23 pm
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SongWriterJoe
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Nice work cmaja. Only thing I see might be the clarity of the meaning of in-betweens. I ran into a similar problem when writing "Papa's Overalls" which attempted to create a new metaphor. I wasn't referring to his work clothes, but a code of honor he left me with. It was too close to "above all", and I've never been satisfied with it. It was supposed to be kinda like the lyrical style of "Leader of the Band", the great pop ballad.

Last edited on Fri Nov 8th, 2019 10:26 pm by SongWriterJoe



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 Posted: Tue Nov 12th, 2019 04:16 am
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cmaja
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Hey SW Joe, in-betweens add to the mystery. It doesn’t matter what they are when one falls in love. Thanks for the compliment.

Charles

Last edited on Tue Nov 12th, 2019 04:19 am by cmaja



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