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Hammer Down
 Moderated by: Troy33, RainyDayMan, HankTheTank
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 Posted: Tue Aug 13th, 2019 11:40 pm
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BRD
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Kind of a wierd structure for me. I usually have a chorus, but I didn't feel it here.


V1
I got the hammer down in the left lane
Passing mile markers on the interstate.
A pretty girl in the passenger seat
I’m singing for her, she’s laughing at me.
We’re driving west on I-30 headed down to Texarkana.
No worries about today, just living life like we wanna.

V2
I got the ragtop down on the old highway.
Pocket full of cash, it’s pay day.
A country song on the radio.
Going wherever she wants to go.
We’re cruising at 55 with the wind blowing through our hair.
Don’t know where we’re going guess we’ll know when we get there.

Bridge
We’re going pedal to the metal every mile.
Singing every country song on the radio dial.
No plans to drive down Park Avenue.
Too much life ahead of us, no concerns in the rearview.

V3
I got the tailgate down on a dusty back road.
Sneak off and park by my secret fishing hole.
Look at the stars above our heads.
Cuddled under a blanket in my truck bed.
We’re making love to the sound of nature’s symphony.
We aint worried about tomorrow, we’re just making these memories.

Outro
I got the hammer down in the left lane.
Passing mile markers on the interstate.
Pretty girl in the passenger seat.
I’m singing for her, she’s laughing at me.

© B.R.D.

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 Posted: Fri Aug 16th, 2019 01:09 pm
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RainyDayMan
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BRD I have to say this one isn't my favorite.

I've been holding off posting hoping I could give you something specific to look at, rather than just being vague, but I'm afraid I can't put my finger on what it is. I figured it was better to give you any feedback rather than none, so here it is. Wish I could be more constructive. :?



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 Posted: Fri Aug 16th, 2019 03:51 pm
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BRD
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No problem! They can't all be winners.

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 Posted: Mon Aug 19th, 2019 01:41 am
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bunnythesinger
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I found a lot to like here BRD... reread it tried to sing it in my mind...and it finally hit me theres at least 2 different vehicles ( but im not really all here right now)...so i got the im putting ...whatever ...hammer ,ragtop, down. And it works for me. Guess i was thinking it was all the same trip on the firsth read. I would like to see a chorus with a great hook here rather than only gthe bridge and i like the outro. Im thinking that a chorus between the verses would separate the trips. I think its got a lot of potential...and i do love a good traveling song.

Bunny



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 Posted: Mon Aug 19th, 2019 02:26 pm
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cmaja
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Hey BRD,
The structure you have is typical AABA with a coda. It developed from AAA, which is all identical stanzas. AABA was used quite extensively in the early 1900s for blues and jazz. Nothing weird about it. I use it a lot.

Charles



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 Posted: Tue Aug 27th, 2019 09:04 pm
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jdtaper
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This is THE perfect fun, fell-good, roll-the-windows-down country songs! Awesome job! :)



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 Posted: Wed Aug 28th, 2019 10:33 pm
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Andrea
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Hi BRD, I am not the expert in country music, but I kind of liked the message. Has "feel good" vibe.

I do question saying "We’re cruising at 55" and then saying, "We’re going pedal to the metal every mile.". I think maybe flying or speeding might fit better.



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