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Walk Away
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 Posted: Fri Aug 9th, 2019 01:01 am
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RainyDayMan
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Walk Away
© 2019 Owen Hovenden

Link to Music

Verse 1:
3am, and I'm wide awake
My brain, won't let me sleep
Your words, keep rattling 'round
Like wheels on a train
Like rain on the window pane

Chorus:
Walk away, from these broken dreams
Walk away, from this lonely house
Walk away, cause there's nothing left
To do or say, but walk away

Verse 2:
In my mind, there's still more to give
But the sky, has just fallen in
Comes a time, when we must admit
Love must die so we can live
Die so we can live

Chorus

Bridge:
And the pitcher can't be unbroken
Like your words cant be unspoken
And the djinni won't go back in the bottle again
Oh no

Chorus

Time to walk away



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 Posted: Fri Aug 9th, 2019 02:55 pm
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jamestoffee
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There is a lot I like here in the chord progression and some of the lines like "But the sky, has just fallen in" "Love must die so we can live""Like your words cant be unspoken"

One thing that is unclear is if the chorus is the words the person who left said to the singer and those are the words "rattling 'round" OR is the singer talking to himself, so without understanding the POV, it's a bit hard to understand the message.

Also, consider using a guitar tuner before you hit record so the tuning doesn't distract from the song presentation.

Thanks for sharing.

James



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 Posted: Fri Aug 9th, 2019 04:43 pm
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samiamiamsam
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I like it Owen. Has a lot of great parts. I especially like the chorus and the lyrics.
Great musical accompaniment as usual from you.
Not sure about the previous comment. Your guitar sounds in tune to me.
Another quality track from you. Great job!



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 Posted: Fri Aug 9th, 2019 11:09 pm
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RainyDayMan
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@jamestoffee Thanks for the constructive comments James.
Hadn't occurred to me that the POV might be an issue, so thanks for that. That's the benefit of posting here!

@samiamiamsam Thanks Sam, always appreciate your input :)



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 Posted: Sun Aug 11th, 2019 01:10 am
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moptop
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I love this line:

Comes a time, when we must admit
Love must die so we can live
Die so we can live


The guitar has a great tone in this and the mix is spot on, near perfect, clean and clear. This definitely is a keeper! Good job RD Man!

Thanks for sharing.



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 Posted: Sun Aug 11th, 2019 01:26 am
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RainyDayMan
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Thanks Moptop! Appreciate the listen :)



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 Posted: Sun Aug 11th, 2019 01:27 am
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M.P. Dudash
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Owen, nice clean vocals on this one. Agree with moptop about that line. Much better than just saying move on. Good work!



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 Posted: Sun Aug 11th, 2019 01:28 am
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RainyDayMan
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Cheers Mike!



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 Posted: Mon Aug 19th, 2019 04:24 pm
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bunnythesinger
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RDM, Really nice write and performance. Sounds very nice... really like the structure and a lot of fun to pick along with...one of the bars i set for songs that i like...does it make me wanna play along...this one does it. Thumbs up. Bunny



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 Posted: Mon Aug 19th, 2019 04:58 pm
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Marty Ray Boone
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Wow, you posted this on the 8th and here I just found it on the 19th. I like what I am hearing. You have another winner. :Guitarman1:



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 Posted: Mon Aug 19th, 2019 10:28 pm
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RainyDayMan
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@bunnythesinger yep, making you want to play along is a good sign! Glad this one made you feel that way :)

@Marty yes, you slacker! Taken your time haven't you! ;) Just kidding. Thanks for the listen :)



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 Posted: Thu Aug 22nd, 2019 11:58 pm
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Andrea
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I always like your lyrics so much! This bridge was interesting.

Although the music was fine, these lyrics don't sound country in my mind. I could hear them as rock, or maybe pop. "Walk away" - just sounds so beautifully bold. I want to rock out to it :)



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 Posted: Fri Aug 23rd, 2019 12:47 am
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RainyDayMan
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Thanks Andrea! I see what you mean. I can certainly imagine the chorus being done in a rock style. Not as sure about the verses, they might need rework if I went that way. Not sure it's really Country as it stands either! Some sort of cross-over at best ;)



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 Posted: Fri Aug 23rd, 2019 09:38 pm
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Andrea
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This could totally fit todays music- chorus and verses. Not my rock, but I can hear very nicely : A smooth groove. It could get heavier in places if it felt right.



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 Posted: Sat Aug 24th, 2019 04:38 pm
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Motorist Sketchbook
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Good job RDM. Thanks for posting.

I agree with Andrea. The Bridge really stood out to me.
Interesting to see that Arabic spelling for "Genie".
It gives it a darker reference due to the etymological connection with "Jinn". (demon)

"Bridge:
And the pitcher can't be unbroken
Like your words cant be unspoken
And the djinni won't go back in the bottle again
Oh no"

As I listened, I was waiting for that little extra something
that has been in your music over the last year. But I didn't hear it on this one.
Seems to need a solo, or a change in instrumentation somewhere. ???
And perhaps a stronger turnaround between verses. ???
Those would be my suggestions for improvement.

Sketch



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 Posted: Sat Aug 24th, 2019 10:49 pm
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RainyDayMan
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Thanks Steve! Yes, I agree with you that this one isn't quite as strong as I'd like. Haven't decided yet whether to invest more time or just move on. But your suggestions are good ones! Looking forward to hearing more of your music when time allows!



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 Posted: Wed Aug 28th, 2019 10:44 pm
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Good tune....I would speed it up 2 or 3 clicks. It seems to drag to me

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 Posted: Wed Aug 28th, 2019 11:16 pm
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RainyDayMan
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Thanks for the suggestion Steve! I'll try that out :)



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 Posted: Tue Sep 3rd, 2019 08:08 pm
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Kellyanneg
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Hi Owen,
I think this is great! I love your chord changes...they really add emotion to your lyrics. I can hear it as a country song, also as soft rock. This is a really good song! Great rythm/groove.. it all fits. I really like the bridge lyrics as well. Great job.
Kelly 👍😊



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 Posted: Tue Sep 3rd, 2019 09:50 pm
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RainyDayMan
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Thank you very much!



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