The Songwriters' Forum - by Songwriters, for Songwriters > Lyrics Lounge > Country Lyrics - All Forms > Yeah That’s Life |
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M.P. Dudash Contributor ![]()
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First off I know this may seem odd and may read like a poem to many. But, I did look into this and several well known bands have pulled it off. Queen, Rod Stewart’s Maggie May being one. These lines came to me and though it even seems odd to me, can it work? Is it more genre specific? Thanks for looking There’s last calls for whiskey And last calls from loved ones Either which way You’ll look back on the other Yeah that’s life And it’s bound to, touch us all.... On one hand it’s please Can you call me a cab On the other it’s mom Sayin’ you better come fast Yeah that’s life And It’s a rocky road we’re on.... We think we have lots But time quickly moves on You blink and you’re 40 Then it’s almost gone Yeah that’s life And the truly lucky...grow old Some live for the moment Others live in the past Tomorrow’s their repeat Of what ain’t coming back Yeah that’s life And time is all we have Yeah that’s life to me From what little I know It don’t take money To be blessed with it all It only takes family.... Yeah that’s life You can live how you want And happily go along Or strive to please others From the day that you’re born But that ain’t life If you ain’t living A life you love Yeah that’s life When you’re living.... what you love.... Copyright © M.P. Dudash 2/1/2019 |
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RainyDayMan TSF Administrator ![]()
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Doesn't read like a poem to me, I don't see why it shouldn't work. In general, one way to work a song without a chorus is to have more variation in the music within the verse. You could even combine two verses together with a more complicated melody throughout. In this case the "Yeah that's life" is likely to be the same in each case though. |
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M.P. Dudash Contributor ![]()
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I can accept that. I wanted to see how it was taken. Thanks for the reply Owen. |
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SongWriterJoe Member ![]()
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Maggie May rhymes.. sorry would have to hear a vocal.. even Acapella ![]() Last edited on Wed Feb 6th, 2019 01:04 am by SongWriterJoe |
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Andrea Moderator
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First off, I really like the lyrics. I think you can make it work. "Yeah that’s life" is a great line. I think you could work with this to make it more song like if needed. Maybe use a repeat Yeah that’s life Yeah that’s life And it’s bound to, touch us all.... or Yeah that’s life that's life And it’s bound to, touch us all.... |
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Kel Member
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G'day M.P., I like what you've done here, but will offer two things to think about... Rather than having so many verses, I suggest cutting back to 3 with a bridge... AABA. It's a structure that works well, and is one of the most successful structures in songwriting (so say the coaches.) Whether you change structure or not, I don't feel the final verse is as powerful as it needs to be. If you can have the verses prior to the bridge (if you use one) with an odd number of lines, have the final verse with an even number to make it feel complete. Having an odd number of lines leaves it feeling unfinished... I know I said two, but also consider how long the song will be when put to music. Keep it to 3 minutes and change, and if that means trimming the number of lines, that's what will be needed. My thoughts, for what they're worth. Cheers, Kel |
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Motorist Sketchbook Member ![]()
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I don't see any problem with this style of writing. (verses only) I have used this technique successfully. IMHO Most notably on these three songs titled: To the End of the World (link to forum topic) When Life Shows Up (link to forum topic) Who Ya Gonna Call, Big Daddy? (link to forum topic) I like what Kel is saying about reconsidering the structure. I think it could be as simple as swapping the second to last verse up to the verse three position. That would be as AABAAC structure. (with an ending as written) - Sketch |
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M.P. Dudash Contributor ![]()
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Thanks Steve. Being a guy that likes to write but doesn’t know all the intricacies of proper song structure does seem to be my downfall. What is obvious to those of you that do know it, is not my strongpoint. This was kind of a conversation piece that I didn’t expect great feedback with, but I wanted to see how others felt. I will check those songs out you suggested to see how they sound. Thanks for looking and the advice. |
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Motorist Sketchbook Member ![]()
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M.P. Dudash wrote: Thanks Steve. Being a guy that likes to write but doesn’t know all the intricacies of proper song structure does seem to be my downfall. What is obvious to those of you that do know it, is not my strongpoint. This was kind of a conversation piece that I didn’t expect great feedback with, but I wanted to see how others felt. I will check those songs out you suggested to see how they sound. Thanks for looking and the advice. Rules were made to be broken. (oftentimes) At the end of the day, if it works, it works. - Sketch |