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Cry
 Moderated by: Troy33, RainyDayMan, HankTheTank
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 Posted: Thu Dec 6th, 2018 02:20 pm
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1st Post
Khalysha
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Joined: Fri Sep 14th, 2018
Location: Florida USA
Posts: 25
Favorite Artist: Adele, Kathy Perry, Adam Levine
I am a: Songwriter
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I just want to share this song since I found a singer and musician to work with and want to get feedback about what we did. Thank you!


Cry

Cry, cry, cry...
All I can do is cry.
Watching the story of us
Pass by.

Your body still here
But you already left.
And words feel so cold.
It's hurts me
Seeing you try so hard.

Chorus

And all I can do is
Cry.... cry
Thinking of you
And you thinking
Of the moonlight.

Cry, cry, cry
I wish you say
You love me
But it would be a lie
And I just cry...

2

All the memories
Don't matter anymore.
So, let's stop the torture.

If you want to go just go.
If there's no way to fix this
I don't want to keep
trying, I don't.

Chorus

So all I can do is
cry.... cry
Thinking of you
And you thinking
Of the Moonlight.

Cry, cry, cry
I want you so much
But I don't have
Strength left to fight.

https://www.procollabs.com/store/1375

© Veronica Lopez 2018

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 Posted: Thu Dec 6th, 2018 03:42 pm
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2nd Post
samiamiamsam
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Joined: Mon Jun 18th, 2018
Location: Charlotte , North Carolina USA
Posts: 251
Favorite Artist: Beatles, Pink Floyd, Leadbelly, Nirvana, REM, Leonard Cohen, Robert Johnson
I am a: Singer/Songwriter/Musician
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So happy that you found yourself a band. It's sounds good. Is that you singing? I've always liked your lyrics. Music sounds really cool. I like the little hook you do right before the chorus. That is the kind of thing that grabs people's attention.

Great job Khalysha!



____________________
Here is my YouTube and SoundCloud page with some of my original music.

https://www.youtube.com/user/odomodometer/videos
https://soundcloud.com/user-71329120
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 Posted: Thu Dec 6th, 2018 08:01 pm
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Andrea
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Joined: Tue Nov 27th, 2018
Location: Poughkeepsie, New York USA
Posts: 74
Favorite Artist: Queen, Tom Petty, Metallica, Kansas, Guns N' Roses
I am a: Songwriter
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It has a cool sound. Nice



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Andrea
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 Posted: Thu Dec 6th, 2018 09:28 pm
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RainyDayMan
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Joined: Thu May 17th, 2007
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 4665
Favorite Artist: James Taylor, Cat Stevens, Joni Mitchell
I am a: Songwriter/Musician
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You've a really strong mood/style/sound going on here, and the vocal is great.
For me, the lyric is fine, but the music is better.
I second Sam's comment on the riff before the chorus, that works especially well.
This feels like it could go somewhere.

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 Posted: Thu Dec 6th, 2018 09:55 pm
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5th Post
Marty Ray Boone
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Joined: Mon Oct 24th, 2011
Location: Fort Mill, South Carolina USA
Posts: 682
Favorite Artist: "Rev.Jimmy Swaggart" "Owen Hovenden" Kerry Boone
I am a: Singer/Songwriter/Musician
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So much emotion! I love it. :cool:



____________________
Marty Ray Boone, now seeking God's will for my life and asking if I may serve him as a gospel bass singer and singer of harmonies in that form of music! I thank Holy God for my voice! Near perfect pitch as well, guidance for my fingers on that piano, AMEN
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