View single post by hardtwistmusic
 Posted: Fri Jan 25th, 2013 04:26 pm
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hardtwistmusic



Joined: Sun Jan 8th, 2012
Location: Salem, Oregon USA
Posts: 679
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Angel of Nothing wrote:
So I've had this chorus for the past couple of months but I don't know if it's really any good or not. Here it is let me know what you thinks.

"I won't be the next link in the chain
Of your self-destructive ways
No I won't play this game
I'm not waiting here again
I already watched our love slip away."

Thanks everyone.

~Kayleigh


I can't know how you're melody sounds... but for me, the first line lurches a little at "the next."

The cadence seems to me (again without knowing your melody) to be asking for "I won't be A link in the chain
of your self destructive ways."

The melody will dictate.

Aside from that, this is really powerful in my opinion.



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