View single post by blukatnga
 Posted: Mon Apr 4th, 2011 02:41 pm
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blukatnga



Joined: Fri Oct 16th, 2009
Location: Georgia USA
Posts: 867
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Allycat, Whew ! Take a breath dude/dudette !! It is very evident to me that you have a great way with words. Your work is not self indulgent (which is really nice) and your metre is in there somewhere and it "feels" good to me. I might suggest, in order to get more feedback here would be to titleize your work, clearly break up and identify the verses and do the same for the chorus especially if this is a country tune. When everything runs together like this one, it is a hard read....feel me? I would love to see this organized in a song format cause I'm certain I will dig it !!

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