View single post by SundownSam
 Posted: Fri May 14th, 2010 10:27 pm
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SundownSam



Joined: Thu Jul 24th, 2008
Location: Ellenwood , Georgia USA
Posts: 7967
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Andy, I am really proud of you! You have been steady plugging away on this song ever since you got here and with each new posting it has gotten better and better! I still stumbling a little in a few places when reading it, but if you already have a melody in mind for it then the music may very well be taking care of those places.

This is just my two, but I think the chorus needs to be spiced up a little more, it's lacking a little in the punch you want your chorus to have when it comes in following the verses. Unfortuantely, I don't have anything I can offer at the moment on what that might be, but if I think of anything I'll yell back atcha. 

All in all Andy it's shapely up really nicely. :cool: Way to hang in there and show it who's boss!!!  



____________________
First you write it with your heart - then you re-write it with your head

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