View single post by Jeff Knight
 Posted: Sat Apr 8th, 2006 03:48 am
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Jeff Knight

Joined: Tue Jan 10th, 2006
Location: Very East Nashville, Lol, North Carolina USA
Posts: 2299
MAI: You have the makings of a hit song here.
Very good hook and concept !!! Kudos !!!

But let me tell you my opinion, so keep or sweep :)

I had a great image going in my mind with visuals
all the way through to the end of the 1st Chorus.
Once the 2nd verse started, I lost the visuals and
had to start thinking in abstract. This to me, means
that the song lost it's flow starting with the 2nd
verse even though the vusuals kept coming back
temporary in the choruses. Just my opinion as I am
a nobody, so throw this right in the trash can LOL.

Wish I had thought of this hook !!!!
I'm envious ..... grrrrrrr !!!!! LOL :)

Songwriting is composed of two acts,
first inspiration, and then exploration
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