View single post by RainyDayMan
 Posted: Sun Nov 29th, 2020 09:58 pm
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RainyDayMan



Joined: Thu May 17th, 2007
Location: Stratford, Australia
Posts: 6888
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I like the chord sequences you are using here.
The refrain is particularly good.

I like the verses too, but there are a couple of spots that feel a bit squished like:
I can’t help but get lost in your eyes
do, ‘Cos I know you’ll never look up and see

I think they could be smoothed out, maybe:
I get lost within your eyes
do, I know you’ll never look up and see

Worth pursuing!



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