View single post by RainyDayMan
 Posted: Sat Sep 12th, 2020 02:49 am
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RainyDayMan



Joined: Thu May 17th, 2007
Location: Stratford, Australia
Posts: 6887
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Bitterness and anger coming through loud and clear - and conveying emotion is always a good thing.

In v2 I would try to avoid using sure and surely on consecutive lines. You might consider swapping sure > know :
You take the high road while I'll take the low, Someday I know we'll meet.
to get the internal rhyme on low/know.

Seems like this will be one to enjoy when you're in a particular mood.



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