View single post by cmaja
 Posted: Mon Aug 3rd, 2020 06:55 pm
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cmaja



Joined: Fri Mar 22nd, 2019
Location: Kennewick, Washington USA
Posts: 1054
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RainyDayMan wrote:
"She's got bounce" works. The song feels full of energy, and fairly light-hearted and that works too.

Just repeating things here really:
V1 L2 is confusing
Chorus L2 feels a bit too comedic
Chorus L4 comes across as crass to me, maybe ‘speshly where it counts

But overall there's a lot there to like, with just a few minor points, and as always, those are your choices to make.


Thanks, RD Man for your review and suggestions.

V1, L2 is confusing. Alight is the wrong word. I mean light up.

Chorus, L2: that’s the second comment about it. I’ll change it.

Chorus, L4: I originally had ‘it’ instead of ‘love’ but I didn’t want the listener’s mind to wander, since love is the focus and ‘it’ is subject to interpretation. Whether it’s crass or not is subjective.

Always appreciate your reviews.

Charles

Last edited on Mon Aug 3rd, 2020 06:59 pm by cmaja



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All songs are from God. Those that are not, aren’t songs at all.
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